Why Millennial Women Want to Date Older Men

The recent Vanity Fair article detailing the more lurid underbelly of online dating—the barrage of dick pics, the endless swiping, the death of romance—was grim, if not horrific. Dating, Vanity Fair would have you believe, is evolving into an elaborate charade of deception: Everybody is petrified of giving someone the “wrong idea.” Men are impolite to the point of viciousness to ensure that the women they just hooked up with understand they don’t want a relationship. Women “self-objectify” in profile pictures to get men interested, renouncing the “wrong idea” that they might want something more than a one-night stand. No matter which way you spin it, landing yourself in a committed relationship seems to be, by millennial standards, “the wrong idea.”

I want to believe that Vanity Fair selected only their most salacious interviewees to quote, but I know that’s not true. I’ve received my fair share of lewd attention during my online dating tenure to verify: It really is that bad. But I’ve noticed a new strategy among my set of female friends—lovely, intelligent, independent women—to combat the grime of the online dating world: date up.

I don’t mean status, I mean age. More and more women I know are dating men twice, yes twice, their age. In her new film, The Intern, Anne Hathaway stands with Robert DeNiro and a bunch of young male colleagues in a bar and draws a harsh comparison: “How in one generation have men gone from guys like Jack Nicholson and Harrison Ford to . . .?” She gestures despairingly at the four men in front of her, archetypes of my generation in their hoodies, craft beer in one hand, iPhone in the other, with their untrimmed beards and general lack of ambition. I see what Hathaway means: Why put up with Tinder when there’s a whole generation of men out there who wouldn’t dream of using it?

There have never been more advantages to relationships with older men, precisely because Tinder and its ilk have made dating feel impossible to those of us who don’t want to participate in the battle of who-cares-less. Reach back two decades and you are more likely to find a man who can’t fathom swiping through a series of pictures to find a mate for the night.

My friend Gabrielle met her boyfriend at a restaurant opening. They are twenty years apart, and they’ve been together for two. He “treats me like I’m a person,” she told me. “I watch so many of my other friends agonize over text messages from guys who . . . just clearly don’t care.” The stereotypes, she says, are true: Older men are attentive, they aren’t threatened by your career success, they didn’t grow up watching porn on their laptops, and they certainly don’t expect sex from you before you’ve even had a chance to meet. It’s not an “old-fashioned” dating scheme, it’s just a more humane one. “I wasn’t trying to go back in time,” Gabrielle added at the end of our conversation. “Nobody wants to go back to the 1950s, we just want to be treated with respect.”

But there are downsides to large age disparities, and women in particular sacrifice a great deal when they make this choice. Child-bearing and rearing becomes complicated, not to mention the potential for earlier onset of age-related medical challenges, as well as confronting constant social stigma. It’s all pretty inconceivable in the long term, and yet it’s happening all the same. That’s how badly women want to escape the Tinderverse.

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  • Terenc Blakely

    Women hooking up with older men…. a new and earthshaking event.

    As one wag put it; “Well, Pajama Boy isn’t exactly the guy to set your loins a-tingle now, is he?”.

    • Steve Kellmeyer

      Of course, that same (somewhat elderly) wag also supports legal prostitution, so he doesn’t really care if these women end up on the pole.

      • Terenc Blakely

        Assuming you are correct (rather unlikely) how exactly does that impact this article and my comment how? A classic troll comment; an ad-hominem attack on something utterly peripheral to the discussion.

        • Steve Kellmeyer

          Ask the “wag” what he thinks about legal prostitution, or read his blog – he’s quite clear about that, legal abortion, slicing and dicing embryos, selling organs. He’s a libertarian who supports ALL those positions.

          In fact, when asked his position on slicing, dicing babies and selling their organs, he refuses to answer. So, yeah, he explicitly favors prostitution. He has no problem with women dancing on poles. All good. He doesn’t give a flip about most things. Look him up on Google. Easy enough to check.

        • Steve Kellmeyer

          Ask the “wag” what he thinks about legal prostitution, or read his blog – he’s quite clear about that, legal abortion, slicing and dicing embryos, selling organs. He’s a libertarian who supports ALL those positions.

          In fact, when asked his position on slicing, dicing babies and selling their organs, he refuses to answer. So, yeah, he explicitly favors prostitution. He has no problem with women dancing on poles. All good. He doesn’t give a flip about most things. Look him up on Google. Easy enough to check.

          • Again: what does that have to do with the article?

          • Terenc Blakely

            Apparently that wag kicked his dog or something. Kind of a stalker mentality.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            It isn’t about the article, it’s about your comment. You remarked that women hooking up with older men is not new, and then quoted a well-known blogger whose ethics resembles that of a pig for support of your remark.

            I pointed out that the person you quoted to support your remark has the ethics of a pig. Then you trolled my remark. I don’t know why.

          • DaleC

            And we libertarians find your forcing women to behave in certain ways to be piggish. Weird, huh?

            As far as “caring” for these women, unless you operate some kind of ministry outreach to house, feed, clothe and care for those women, or donate significantly to one, neither do you.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            Oh, please. Dicing babies and selling their organs is what the blogger supports. He also supports legal prostitution.

            If we don’t like the law “forcing” people to behave in certain ways, then let’s get rid of rape, burglary, armed robbery and murder laws. Wouldn’t want to interfere with people’s autonomy, right? Libertarianism has all the intellectual force of a teenager.

          • DaleC

            As mentioned before, those acts violate another persons rights.

            Put in language you might understand, Your right to swing your fist ends at the tip of my nose.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            As mentioned before, when that child is still in the womb, Glenn Reynolds has no problem with slicing and dicing the baby. Zero. He has been asked on numerous occasions to make a public statement. He refuses.

            He is on record supporting (1) legal abortion – in fact, he claims he is one of the few lawyers who thinks RvW was CORRECTLY decided, (2) organ sales. Thus, he can have no logical objection to slicing and dicing babies and selling their organs.

            “Your right to swing your fist ends at the tip of my nose.” is a nonsensical rule. By invoking it, you force your morality, your idea of what constitutes proper behaviour, on to someone else. If you really believe in individual liberty, why should ANYONE accept that your rule is valid? You aren’t the boss of other people. If they decide that their right to swing their fist ends when you lie coughing up your heart’s blood in the street, who are you to tell them different?

          • DaleC

            One of the “few” lawyers? Give me a break. Selling there organs violates the law. Weird, but libertarians do believe in following existing laws.

            Assault violates another persons rights. Please go troll someone else.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            “Few lawyers”: those were his words, not mine.

            If selling the organs violated the law, they would be up on charges.

            You haven’t answered the question about slavery. Legally, libertarians should have ZERO problem with someone deciding to sell themselves into slavery.

            Libertarians are teenage pigs.

      • DaleC

        Prostitution and pole-dancing are not the same. Some do both, but the vast majority do not.

        I will assume you are referencing Instapundit, aka Glenn Reynolds, the law professor. Since when is 55 years of age considered “somewhat elderly”? He is also one of the most respected law professors and Constitutional scholars in the country.

        Referencing Prof. Reynolds, we libertarians have this shocking notion that a person should be in control of their own body. We don’t, necessarily, support prostitution, drug use, abortion, pole dancing, etc… what we DO support is your RIGHT to control YOUR body. Weird, I know.

        If the Professor were not happily married to beautiful and accomplished woman, he would be the kind of guy a smart Millennial female would be drawn to like a moth to a flame.

        • Steve Kellmeyer

          The Professor’s wife nearly died from the use of hormonal birth control, yet that same pig still promotes the use of hormonal birth control – even though he knows full well that it is deadly.

          If you control your own body, then stop getting old. Stop growing hungry. Teeny-bopper “intellectuals” like yourself and Glenn Reynolds don’t seem to understand that your premise is wrong. We don’t control our own bodies. Never have. And what we do with our bodies – burglary, theft, rape, assault, murder – certainly should be subject to the law. But, immaturity has a strong draw, which is why libertarians rally around libertarianism like moths to a flame.

          • DaleC

            Wow, can’t argue with that “logic”. By your logic, nothing is in our control.

            “burglary, theft, rape, assault, murder – ” ALL violate the rights of ANOTHER person, unlike drug use, alcohol use, prostitution, etc.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            So, should I have the right to sell myself into slavery? According to YOU, YES! Yes, I should!

            So, according to you, the United States was WRONG to outlaw slavery because I should have the right to sell myself as a slave if I wanted. In fact, many southern blacks did exactly that, to pay off family debts. So, you see nothing wrong with that!

            What wonderful logical consistency!

          • DaleC

            Go troll someone else. That wasn’t slavery and you know it.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            You don’t have an answer, DaleC.
            Libertarian philosophy doesn’t work.
            It permits slavery.

            Libertarianism is a stupid teenage fantasy.

  • Chance Boudreaux

    Reality catches up to Feminism.

  • There’s been a commonly cited “rule of thumb” around for 30 or more years that the youngest (adult) woman a man should date and consider marrying is half his age plus 7; e.g., a 40-year-old man shouldn’t date anyone younger than 27, or else it becomes a bit creepy. If this article’s assertions are accurate, it’s the women themselves who are bending or breaking this rule of thumb due to the immaturity & lack of life direction of their own age cohort. And that’s a very sad commentary on our culture.

    • tsol

      I always heard that the man has to be 6 years (minimum) older than the woman, so the man would be up to her desired level of maturity and would be more established financially.

    • Anthony Mxyzptlk

      C. Northcote Parkinson articulated this rule around 1963 or so. For women to apply it, they must double their age, then subtract 14. For example, a 27-year old woman would multiply her age by 2 (54), then subtract 14 to get 40.
      A 25-year old woman would double to 50, then subtract 14 to get 36.

  • There are likely at least two reasons for this:

    1. The long term traditional pattern of older, successful men paired with younger “eye candy”, aka the phenomenon of the so-call “Trophy Wife”. A pattern that has existed throughout recorded history, and. .

    2. The current crop of young males is encumbered with massive debt from education expenses, moribund economies worldwide, and a cultural trend that actively opposes the traditional “manly” traits and virtues. Or, the short version, between an accomplished, successful man, and a “Pajamaboy”, the vast majority of women will choose the successful man. . .

    • Phil Harrell

      So I’m not the only one that thinks they just like real men over wimps, I’m 18 yrs older than my gf she’s 34. 4 yrs and so far it’s good, probably doesn’t hurt I treat her as my equal and she pretty much is…

      • DaleC

        I hear you and agree, though most people won’t believe the “equal” part. Oh well, their problem, not ours.

  • Jay Currie

    When I was forty I dated a girl – and lived with her – who was 22. Great fun. She was delighted to be treated as a lady which was basically all I knew how to do. But it was not going to go anywhere simply because the gap in interests and experience was too wide.

    Of course, really clever girls have been older, wealthier men’s mistresses pretty much forever and, in some ways, that is a healthier relationship.

    • “Of course, really clever girls have been older, wealthier men’s mistresses pretty much forever and, in some ways, that is a healthier relationship”
      At least it is a lot more honest.

  • 270

    The happiest man you’ll ever see is a guy in his 40s or 50s dating a woman 15 years younger. At least for the first six months they’re together.

    • m a

      No…. the happiest guy is the one in his 40s/50s enjoying his pursuits and able to meet his responsibilities.
      I’m in that category and my daughter wants to create an on-line dating profile for me. (wife dumped me a few years ago, I kept the kids and the house. She visits.) I asked my daughter if she thinks I’m happy? She said yeah dad, but you deserve to have somebody!! I asked if she ever stopped to think that perhaps I’m happy not despite the fact I have no woman in my life, but because if it?

      • Fraga123

        You deserve 4 somebodies. In rotation.

      • John Williams

        It’s sweet that your daughter cares about you.

        • m a

          Well, my kids appreciated my loyalty to them. Maintaining their home in such a way that their mom could come and visit routinely. Every morning to see them off to school, even after they were in high school and drove themselves, bring them dinner once a week, after work a couple times a week etc. (She only moved a couple miles away) Stayed single so they’d have a stable home with less drama, parked the motorcycle so they wouldn’t worry about that. Youngest (son) turned 18 and I think they now figure I should start getting back into things.
          I did get the bike running again. : )

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  • PurpleAndBlue

    How many older men are there? Are they all divorced? Hmmmm

    Relationships have been taking a hit for some time, and it’s not because something about having a Y chromosome makes you an awful person. In point of fact, nothing scuttles a relationship quicker than one-sided thinking which would sooner blame than reflect. Just have a look at the sociopathy sweepstakes that is modern family law..

    We have a dynamic based on individual license begetting division and disaffection. Saying “it’s the stupid boys’ fault” only furthers this.

  • From what I can tell, this phenomenon is distinct from “trophy wives” and mid-life crisis girl-friends.

    Apparently the women in question want an adult male as a companion; one with manners. Many Millennial boys have been raised in a way which emphasized androgyny. Alas, this approach tends to create gamma males; i.e. non-adults. They suffer in comparison to genuinely adult males.

    • Unfortunately so have many Millennial girls.Many Millennial boys have been raised in a way which emphasized androgyny.”
      Unfortunately so have many Millennial girls.

      • 10songsblog

        Yes but this is really a product of feminism forcing boy to not be boys (i.e.e act out, run around ect.) And yes getting girls to think the kitchen is is evil or that you have to be a mother and working woman… It’s more nuanced than that but it has reached an extreme in terms of the denial of biology and our animal natures. Females want a protector and a provider, males want good child bearing hips/mother (even when they don’t children). *shakes head* Seriously the amount to which we as a society try to deny or reject our animal natures is so silly. Many of the problems would lessen if we just accepted who we are, not what we are but who we are a s animals.

        Let’s just say I never saw a dog or cat have as much difficulty finding a mate even when they are being selective.

  • Ernie Paulson

    This all seems to be based on the disparity between what this generation of men are told to be like, and what their female counterparts really want (which is what every generation of female wants, when rendered down). All the headache inducing crap aside: men want respect, and women want love. Pretend doesn’t cut it.

  • The_Eschaton

    As the article said, this could have negative consequences on child bearing; the US fertility rate stands at 1.9 right now, below the established replacement rate of 2.1. We’re not in a demographic death spiral like some developed nations presently are (e.g., Japan, where annual deaths now significantly outnumber annual live births), but it’s still of concern. Luckily the US remains an immigration magnet, which helps offset the decline in fertility.

  • Fraga123

    The best companion for a hot, sexy younger woman is a sophisticated older man.

  • Yaron

    The interesting reality is that this is nothing new and it has been going on since the existence of modern humans. Maturity and stability in men are as valuable as young and vitality in women. Age is relative, it’s the young spirit which gravitates towards the mature and stable one. From both directions as well, many younger men date older women to escape the “games” and immaturity of younger women.

    Either way, it’s a beautiful thing and judgements on age are childish and irrational.

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  • Chance Boudreaux

    Women have always liked more established older men, what’s new here is that feminism has brainwashed Millennials into being sexually unattractive herbs, so their female counterparts have to date Gen X to find real men. Thanks feminists.

    • raymondmarcano

      They are also feminatzis

    • Annabelle

      Thanks MGTOW as well. Both are responsible for messing up gender expectations. I hate gender expectations. I say live and let live.

      • chromecommando

        Did you mean relations? Expectations does not really sufficiently cut it because my understanding is that the latter is all about not expecting anything and live and let live ultimately. Relations? Now that plays a part there for sure, though I’d focus examining the science behind their ideas more like the findings that apparently single men are happiest demographic. But than asking why that is and if change is desired, then what can be done about it.

      • Joe

        MGTOW is simply in self preservation. I think the concept might not be clear.

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  • Fraga123

    Older men are superior in every way. It’s true. Come, younger women, COME!

  • Alice

    Umm… Millennial women have NO money nor do their boys, of course they’re going for the old guy. Of course the delusional old guys think its him… Ha!

    • DaleC

      I’m 50 and can tell you that we DON’T CARE why young and attractive women want to spend time with us 🙂

    • raymondmarcano

      No…I know it’s because of the help that I can provide. But I’ll take it because it’s better than being alone and going out alone. In fact when they are modest and don’t want to hit me up for money I’ll offer a gas card with the dinner date!! Not a bad deal. How’s that for…….Ha!

    • Rath

      So you’re basically admitting that all women are just whores, the difference is that a prostitute asks for payment directly, and other women ask for it indirectly through paying for a date here, a phone bill there, etc.?

      Because it pretty much sounds like you’re saying that the women are just there for the money… period. If the Millennial men had money, the Millennial women would be with them?

      The whole point of “feminism” was for you to be a “strong independent womyn”. Which you apparently don’t want to be, because, surprise, it costs a lot of money to be independent! So the net result of feminism was failure?

      • Alice

        Feminism was a huge success for professional women. They are a tiny segment of the female population, judging from how loud you’d swear they were 100%. They definitely believe they are the only ones who count. What they have done to the average woman is quite vicious. Many men jumped on the bandwagon too, Not having to support a woman, easy no strings attached sex, not having to marry etc. They don’t particularly like feminism themselves but are quick to use anytime it’s useful to them. You are turning them into whores out of your own selfishness, your knowledge that 90% of them are parrots and your refusal to man-up, get married and love, honor and respect a female.

        • Rath

          Why would I “man up” and marry someone when 47% of marriages end up in divorce? I should just toss a coin and if its heads, burn half of my shit. If its tails, I go on as normal.

          Also, why should I have to “support a woman”?

          You wanted independence, you got it.

          • fellowwarrior

            Marriage is a government lie, just like 9/11, except worse

        • Tony Marcum

          Love, honor, and respect goes both ways.

        • primetime2123

          Women should woman up and start acting like women again. Men don’t want some masculine 35 year old professional woman who is ready to settle down.

      • Jennifer Robison

        Not all women. Just millennial ones. It is a fact that as women have enjoyed more economic freedom and independence, they are marrying later and even less because they simply don’t need a spouse financially.

        • primetime2123

          Why is the biggest demographic in poverty women if women have made it ?

      • Tony Marcum

        Amen. My wife was older than me, and it was only about money, I was just too naive to see it in the beginning.

    • Tony Marcum

      Gen-X women, for the most part, have no money either. Unless they stole it in the form of alimony from their ex-husband. What’s the difference?

  • DaleC

    I am a single 50-year old and date women on both sides of my age. Although youthful appearance is nice, you have to talk to each other and I find the younger women tend to have less baggage than older women. A LOT less. Hearing about problem children and idiot ex-husbands doesn’t entertain us. Although this is not true of all women closer to my age, it applies to the vast majority with whom I have interacted.

    I used to avoid younger women, because of the stigma, but found that I enjoy the company better if I ignore the “rules”.

    Speaking of stigma, guess who gives these younger women the hardest time? Women my age hahahaha

    • Tony Marcum

      Dale.. you are exactly right. It’s the jaded men haters who whine about the direction they took their lives, and the fact they cannot get over it, that have placed a stigma. Instead of dealing with their issues and taking care of themselves, they just blame everyone else. That’s why they are alone in the first place, they just can’t see it.

  • Black Ryder

    Once again…. This “problem” all of these foolish females continue to complain about is utterly, totally, completely, fully, and without any doubt or question, the direct and proven with decades of scientific fact to back it up caused by women themselves!!

    To illustrate…. 100% of the females chase the tiny 20% fraction of the men at “the top” and totally ignore the remaining 80% while crying there are no “good men left” as if reality and their personal behavior and choices do not apply to them.

    http://terminalblackout.tumblr.com/post/135220366112/the-problem-has-never-been-a-lack-of-quality-men

    • Annabelle

      Yeah, Photoshop is great, isn’t it? You can literally lie through your teeth and attempt to get others to believe you. Here’s the original Business Insider article:
      http://www.businessinsider.com/causes-of-low-marriage-rates-2014-5

      • Deaths Head

        Wow… As if I give a flying fuck what some random lying whore thinks.

        The proof is in the pudding cunt, and deceitful bitches like you love to sell the bullshit con about how you want a nice guy, but only after you’ve fucked your way through high school, college, a few jobs, and then finally figure out that your snotty attitude doesn’t have the boys lining up for your overpriced and over hyped used goods anymore.

        Then it’s time to offer some sucker 129th place in the support my dope dealers kids for me because I shouldn’t ever need to be responsible game. Face it cupcake, men are waking up to the divorce rape racket that worthless bimbos like you have been trading on for decades.

        So you go right ahead, call me a faggot, or needle dick creepy loser who lives in a basement all you like because your worn out shit show wont sell here!

        So you head on back to chasing those parole violators, making those false rape claims, cashing your welfare check, playing the victim, and screaming about how empowered you are because I’m going to keep showing men that wasting their time, money, sanity, and lives supporting parasites like you isn’t worth it.

      • J Matthews

        The pink X through the word and the different larger font of “the truth…” sort of indicated to me immediately that he was making a point / joke about the article but perhaps the obvious escapes you?

        • Intelligence didn’t escape her, it avoided her like the plague.

    • Annabelle

      Your Tumblr account is why you’re still single when it comes to women. If you don’t like women (as shown by your Tumblr posts), maybe you should try dating men. This could help your “problem” with reality, personal behavior, choices, and psychological projection.

    • Sir Companion

      bad seed

  • 10songsblog

    I tell certain types of guys around me to date up if they want to avoid obnoxious, drunks, or SJW tumblr females and males. They are usually more mature have had some serious therapy, lived life and know what they want and don’t waste time. They don’t pull regret sex antics, or race cards, NEARLY as much because they lived in age before the internet made whining trendy and common and they’ve already cheated and been cheated on and lied to so they know how it feels..

    But a more important factor in all of this is that when the young people who grew praised and told they were special and could not fail all their life get on-line to find their cliques and peers they discover find much to their disdain they are average and just like everybody else. They are not special or even really very unique. They all wear the same clothes and listen to the same music…It’s just a giant HS of average even the usual cliques have such blurred lines that you can’t really use that to find your group (i.e. goth, skater, jock, science nerd…).

    And that hurts… because you want to be unique… this is also why I think there has been such a huge rise in new words people use to describe themselves and things they like. For example what me and my friends called techno now has like 5-7 other terms just so people can say they like something new or different and claim it’s not techno and that they or somebody are doing something new. “When you’re genre fails fails you, give it a new name…”

    This could be applied to anything really. And also think this sameness is one reason the internet produces so much hate speech and angry comments because people don’t want to be like everyone else so they tear down the other to distances themselves and feel unique and special.

    But back to finding out you are bland and like everybody else as I think it relates to dating. You think that would feel unifying except that since most people by in large are unexceptional and you were raised with such praise of your average gifts only to find out they are really average it kind of sucks… And so when you start to date on-line 99% of the people seem so average and blah because because you are drawing from this HUGE pool of what looks like blah to you sooooooo you put even more label and definitions on yourself to prove you are not average and are unique, to try and stand out but don’t really want to wade through the see of blah yourself. Yet too find a good match takes time and if everybody expecting the other 1% of unique peers to wade their way through the blah to you,you get nowhere.

    So I say if you don’t want to waste your time on your average peers date up. You may not have the same pop culture in common but I can guarantee it won’t be boring, being with somebody whose been around the sun a decade or more than you have teaches you a lot more than you can imagine.

  • raymondmarcano

    The bible is full of these stories…old geezers married to young girls some even just teens. This is nothing new. I think it’s popular now in the US because our beloved politicians have destroyed our economy and times are tough just like in a 3rd world country. You break into the paint fab and you’ll get dirty. You invade a 3rd world country and you become 3rd world. But you can’t blame a gal to get more out of a relationship than just being with some young punk who just wants to get his rocks off and enjoy her wears. The old fart like me can help you with college….books included!

    • Sir Companion

      Raymond, you brought the bible up,
      so have you read ‘The Strange Woman’, the meaning behind this story and the offspring that it creates? we need to understand Allegorical opposed to a literal sense.
      Is’s not in just one passage, however it does explain the seed that’s manifested into this world.

      Nothing has changed between man and woman for over six thousand years, Nothing, they are all doing the same things to one another.. A good read is by Annabel Lyon/ The Golden Mean.

      And just because someones a psychologist doesn’t mean jack hoot! they can be more screwed up than the patient, observe, and if asked , only they if they have something constructive to say, it should be said in a way where there client believes they’ve come to a resolution..

      I’ve been reading here between old man river and young girl, Most immigrants, the husband would come over first set up camp, work so his family could make the voyage, his twelve or thirteen year old wife and however man kids they had at that point it became twelve children, she would have had to be pretty young. obvious they weren’t lacking impotence.

      A lot of these young women come down pretty hard on older guys, I like to know what makes then think older man with with half a brain would want anything to do with them, obvious he must have hobbies , If not the Art’s something in life that makes him happy.
      An Einstein quote “Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”

      We do not know tomorrow, one wakes up to ovarian cancer, breast cancer,HPV, and all this young and old guy and what you think is best won’t matter much,

      why do people not take a break between relationships, try to understand that lead to your current ramifications,

      And the one thing we all forget to soon, we all only live so long, for some, life is even shorter.

  • Annabelle

    I like this article but the last paragraph leaves the reader hanging. What kinds of medical issues do younger women have dating older men and what’s up with child-bearing issues?

    • Rath

      It might (I say might because there’s not enough statistically significant evidence to say for certain) be the case that as men get older, their children are at risk for autism.

      • chromecommando

        I am a psychologist and yes that is one of the many that have increased risks like Autism, ADD (ADHD) and genetic conditions. My parents were old when they had me (both +40) and that is likely the reason I have a rare uncurable disease known as Chrons Syndrome and thus also why there wont be a family of my own.

        But don’t let that scare you, rather have it serve as a reminder that should childrearing come into consideration, then there are increasing risks involved and it would be beneficial to have the condition checked out before having a baby. Of course the more fit both parties are, the less likely are there going to be any complications.

        • J Matthews

          yeah, I saw that Swedish study, just as likely due to the vaccines used in the same time period.

        • Teacher_in_Tejas

          ON the other side, a greater chance for a gifted child on the other end of the proverbial Bell Curve. My Mom had me at 42 back in 1965, when women didn’t have kids at 35 let alone 40, and I was reading at a college level in the sixth grade. Although Mom later told me about all those worries they had about problems, especially Downs Syndrome.

      • primetime2123

        Its minimal if the mother is young. The main factor in genetic defects is the mother

    • Jennifer Robison

      Older men have more health problems. Be prepared to be his nursemaid.

      • raymondmarcano

        oh what a stupid warning Jennifer just gave…I bet you’ll be lonely the rest of your life and be an old maid.

      • DoubleCoppers

        As a generalization, that’s correct, but…if a much younger woman picks an older man who already has health problems, it’s an open question as to whether it’s self-sacrificing, ghoulish, or gold-digging. But what of the case where a woman goes out with a healthy, vital older man b/c she’s tired of the characteristics of her cohort men? I’m 62 and my wife is 41, and everyone (who doesn’t know) thinks I’m 40 and she’s 30. In many parts of America, many women older than 35 are overweight and seem to be almost proud of it–they sure aren’t doing anything about it. In contrast, I work out 3x per week, walk the dog 2 miles daily, and control my eating, even though I love to eat and could easily gain 40 or 50 pounds. My thought is “Why should I settle for a woman who’s 40 lbs over (and gaining) just b/c she’s ~ my age?

        A question for you: Would you go out with someone with movie-star looks, say Brad Cooper, Ryan Reynolds, Brad Pitt, with them 40 and you early 20s? If yes, then you understand why men and women are doing so.

      • Tony Marcum

        Wow, you really are not very intelligent. My father is 75 years old and has not a single health problem.

      • boxdin

        I’m 64, mistaken for 50 often, am in exc health, take no pills of any kind, and every part of me still works great. Screw You Jennifer ! You are a walking cliche.

      • boxdin

        What a slam to men who take care of their sick Wives. You are a bitter uninformed idiot.
        I am the opposite of what you ascribe. I’m 64 Wife is 50 entering her 6th year of ovarian cancer. I take care of her in every way, but she is the strong one whom I emulate. We cry alone and together, I worry about my future, but her wonderful attitude shows me how we all should behave. I was married twice before to women like you who did all the bad things mentioned above. I found my wonderful wife in the Philippines 15 years ago. Of course we were to be together forever, but evidently her use of talcum powder earlier in life left her w cancer. One chemos history (Avastan) https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c7ad1fb321d1be9e69d048ddaf82f08c9551c98a9a1e26653000f6331c4a579c.jpg shows it extends her life an avg of 9 months, that was 3 years ago. She has had them all, they are repeating Taxol now, they cannot come up w anything better. Any day w my Wife is better than a day w you or my ex’s.

        She is religious and has increased my religious being and I believe she is running on God power alone now, the chemo just gets in the way, but the docs insist and I can’t argue. I could go on……..

        As I have stated below, I am in excellent health as are my two older brothers. I credit good genes from my Italian Mom.

      • that’s funny I’ll be 53 in a few weeks, I usually get mistaken for someone in their early 40s . I lift weights and train and compete in Brazilian jujitsu . Most millennial’s i see have fat soft bodies they look unhealthy and live a sedentary lifestyle my guess is that I outlive most of these snowflakes

  • sandre

    Just say NO and go older!

  • Reach back two decades and you are more likely to find a man who can’t fathom swiping through a series of pictures to find a mate for the night.

    • Müslim BAY

      sana söz seni bulucam ne olursa olsun bulucam o para benim evden kovulmama neden olacak ve ben her şeyi bırakıp peşine düşücem bi şekilde bulucam seni

  • Joe

    As a gen X’r dating a millennial I agree with most of the article. Older men do know what they want in life and grew up outdoors and having numerous more responsibilities. Only disagreement I have is what was wrong with the 50’s? June and Ward Cleaver weren’t happy? Did he not respect his spouse. He did. He also knew how to be. a man. When being mildly aggressive was a positive. Many Gen x people feel betrayed by boomers and so many children grow up in fatherless homes and now you are bombarded with sexuality confused with accomplishment and crowded prisons because boys didn’t have fathers correct them. Thanks boomers. I will always admire the greatest generation. Grew up during depression and rose to win a horrible war. Boomers felt like they had to re invent the wheel. What a great job they did. Feminism and skinny jeans just aren’t going to bring success.

    • Teacher_in_Tejas

      I’ve always looked at it this way, Every generation has said the following “I am never going to be like my parents” and guess what, most generations did the exact same thing as their parents. But it was the Boomers who grew up with the material wealth earned by the sweat and blood of the Greatest Generation who screwed that up. The generation who stood naked in the rain at Woodstock said, “Hey I’m gonna be cool with my kids. I’ll smoke dope with my son. Let my teenage daughter bring her boyfriend over for the night……” And you know what? They actually went ahead and did it!

  • fellowwarrior

    If she doesn’t know what GLP or chemtrails are, she’s not the one for me

  • Jennifer Robison

    There’s one major flaw in the reasoning of this piece: Older men who would date women young enough to be their daughter are the biggest leches of them all. They’re definitely more subtle and sophisticated about it than their brutish, immature, twenty-something counterparts, but they are every bit as dirty. The only reason they would never use Tinder is because they can’t figure out how to use an app. And yes, Jack Nicholson could probably 100-freaking-percent fathom swiping through pictures to find a cheap date for the night.

    • raymondmarcano

      It’s been around since the beginning of relationships…in fact the norm that you refer to really started in the 19th century…I have had relationships with ladies ranging from 19 to 22 and I’m 58…they laugh easy…they are happy with KFC popcorn chicken and the slightest praise and courtesy towards them they tell you that you are the best and they also say that they are done with guys there age that just want one thing…Sorry Jennifer that this bugs you and it confirms that women my age have a perennial chip on their shoulder and even correct grammar during a dinner date conversation. Who needs that? definitely not a 58 yo like me.

      • Tony Marcum

        Amen Raymond! I’m done with the women my age. Incredibly self-centered, jaded, and only out for their own. My wife who was older than me had to have every single thing her way, and if not, I was the typical man. Oddly, with her being 51, I felt like I was married to a 10 year old.

        I sat with a 22 year old woman last night. The most intelligent, hopeful, and wise woman I have ever spoken with. I felt like I was speaking to what a 51 year old should be.

        • Cliff Eden Gardner

          Watch out for the bait and switch before they get too comfortable.

        • Love Witch

          If you thought a 22 year old was wise, it says a lot about your own intelligence…. Or lack thereof.

    • Tony Marcum

      Another jaded man-hater. It oozes from every word. Get over yourself.

    • Love Witch

      I do like older men, but not the type of older men who replied to your comment. I mean, one goofball just said that he likes younger girls because they are happy with KFC popcorn chicken. That is just pure laziness and one of the reasons why I don’t go for younger men my age. I refuse to be with a younger immature man who puts in zero effort, and I darn sure refuse to date an older guy who is the exact same. It all boils down to maturity. I’ve seen older men who just lack the mental capacity to properly socialize with mature adults, therefore they go after girls in their early 20’s. They are looking for the “kiddy” mentality of young girls.

      When I was 20 I dated a guy who was 11 years older than me, and he was more immature than a 14 year old boy. Pretty much, he wanted me because he thought he could get away with taking me out for KFC popcorn chicken every night. He didnt want to put in effort, and thought that texting and never calling was okay. He couldn’t mentally handle a 30 year old woman, so he went for young ones. Those types of men are a red flag, As proven by the couple of goofballs who replied to your comment.

      Like all people , there are certain older men who you have to look out for. I don’t trust the ones who want 20 year olds, because 20 year olds are neither wise nor mature. So it says a lot about the older man who wants them.

      • SheRa

        And you have effectively come to the heart of the matter. Old or young, people are going to be who they are going to be. It’s not a matter of age, it is a matter of maturity. Thank you for posting this, it nicely sums up what the article could not.

    • raymondmarcano

      Jennifer youre just a femiNazi abortionist baby killer and you would never be able to get a real man..enjoy your boy toys.

  • raymondmarcano

    Yep 100% true…jennifee Robison has pwnis envy issues

  • Jennifer Robison

    I’m not jaded. I’m tired of being hit on by men who are old enough to be my dad. It’s gross. There’s nothing wrong with simply being attracted to younger people. That’s natural. The question is why you are unwilling or unable to relate to people your age in an actual relationship. Nor would “the great majority” of people agree with you that that’s natural. According to Census numbers, marriages in which the husband is 20-plus years older than his wife make up just 0.6 percent of US marriages. Include marriages in which the man is 10 years or more older, and it is still just 6.5 percent. The plurality of marriages — a third of all unions — are between people who are a year or less apart. The median age gap between married couples is less than three years and shrinking every year. Admit you have a problem that is outside the norm and please think about the younger women who don’t want anything to do with old men, and understand there’s something wrong with the ones who do. Thanking you and your pervy brethren in advance for leaving us alone.

    • raymondmarcano

      so stupid labeling that as perverted….you have no idea how to touch a mans heart and the smile of a 20 yo woman can do just that….Jennifer you have issues of hate and envy…seeing an older man as some sort of disgusting reject…don’t worry you’ll get that same discrimination too.

      • Tiffany

        I agree, older men are so much better for younger women

        • Love Witch

          Tis true, but even they need to be screened. I do prefer the company of an older man, but not if he acts and talks like the potty mouthed brutes in this comment thread. I don’t date men my age for this very reason, so why would I date an older man who has the mentality of a millennial?

    • raymondmarcano

      I hope you get dogged by young punk guys the rest of your life…then you’ll be craving for older men to hit on you.

      • Love Witch

        Yikes! To say something like that to another human being who is obviously hurt. It certainly says a lot about your character. You have the mentality of a piggish brut 17 year old boy in a YouTube comment.

        • raymondmarcano

          Love witch you must be a liberal femiNazi abortionist baby killer..I hope you suffer the same fate and your young guy cheats on you.

          • Love Witch

            1) I’m not a feminist.
            2) I just can’t take ya’ seriously, man lol.

          • raymondmarcano

            I said femiNazi pro abortion baby murder liberal

          • Love Witch

            Lol okay

    • Tony Marcum

      It’s gross? really? They are prevs? really? You have confirmed that this is alll your opinion. You don’t like older guys? Then don’t date them. But stay off the internet judging other people who do not see things the way you do. Stop lying to yourself, you are jaded. Just read your first sentence.

      We cannot relate to women our own age, because they are entitled, controlling, and judgmental. No thanks, I’d rather die alone than partake in that again.

      Oh and who’s norm? Yours? Who gets to determine the norm? You?

    • Tiffany

      An older man is what I love, the laughs, fun we have together, time we spend together is more than amazing. My friend is 59, he is 26 years older than me and he is the best man ever!

      • raymondmarcano

        good for you for being open minded about this…thank you…it’s Jennifer Robison’s problem to be with a younger cheating guy…Us old guys are loyal 100% because we appreciate so much the attention from a younger gal that we would never jeopardize that.

    • raymondmarcano

      Youre so stupid and your stats are lies..you will die lonely and the young punks will cheat on you…You are a gross woman jennifer robison

    • raymondmarcano

      you are gross and a perverted sexual predator…Jennifer Robison.

    • Tim Palmer

      Jennifer when you refer to yourself in the sentence “leaving us alone” are you suggesting that you are in the group “younger women” that you also mention? Your photo would suggest to me someone in the age group that would normally be identified as a potential partner for anyone between the age of 35 and say 50… hardly a younger woman. So what age group are you suggesting are “dirty” and “pervs”. Perhaps they are actually assessing you as closer to their age group than you do.

    • JD

      Sorry Jennifer, I am in my forties and you actually look to old for even US mature guys. You’re probably pissed because younger and older men probably reject you regularly.

      • Golden Rod

        JD, Some of these “ladies” just can’t have everything their way, can they?

    • raymondmarcano

      Dumb femiNazi

    • primetime2123

      You look kinda old. Maybe old men think you are the same age as them

  • Project Zeta

    Very well said, sir!

    The entitlement attitude of that woman needed to be countered. Thank you.

  • Iam Popeye99

    Jennifer, I seldom visit this site anymore because I find way to many people expressing their particular ‘opinion’ as though it were a ‘fact’. For whatever reason, I came here now. Maybe it was to consider and process your argument.

    You make two statements which are based on a basic, human error. The belief in absolutes. As each woman is different, so is each man.

    My wife, almost 28 years younger than me, 3 years younger than my oldest son and 7 weeks older than my oldest daughter, and I were married for five years last month. Our approach to intimacy didn’t begin until last summer. She died two weeks after our anniversary.

    When we were going together, I often asked her why she was interested in me. I couldn’t understand this. Her answer was she was looking for something different in a man, and she found it in me.

    Your first absolute, “Older men have more health problems. Be prepared to be his nursemaid,” may be common, but not necessarily the norm. I nursed my wife, one way or another, from about a year after our marriage. I attended her every need 24/7/365. When was the last time you were wakened several times each night to attend to someone’s needs or to comfort them?

    Your next absolute is,”Older men who would date women young enough to be their daughter are the biggest leches of them all.” What I have said already should be an adequate response to this.

    As each person is different, so is each relationship. The problem, as I see it, isn’t age or generation, it is the misguided and prejudicial opinions of others.

    You, Jennifer, have a right to hold and express your beliefs, your opinions. So do I.

  • kiara

    Those kinda relationships are taboo for reason in society and are quite rare ,and its not normal or moral to date someone who can be your father ,grandfather ,mother or grandmother or even worse age like your KID.!
    This kinda articles are always written by the people who are not objective and are not facts but personal opinions..
    I’m not here accusing anyone ,but i think its just not appropiate morally,ethically to do this. Study finds the bigger the age gap, the more likely that the couple will divorce.
    Research from Emory University shows the bigger the age gap in a marriage … the more likely that couple won’t last.
    Now, at first that might sound like it makes sense. But according to this research, even being as little as one year apart can matter. The study was originally published in September 2014.
    In the past people were doing lots of things that are considered illegal today (pedophilia,racism etc..) and women were repressed by society and mans in general ,thats why some young women were (unfortunately still are in 3rd world countries) SOLD because of money and power to RICH OLDER MANS…! Yes sold like slaves !
    I am still young women in my 20’s and i hate when some old man on the street or a pub approach me -and i know for a fact that other young girls thinks the same !

    • Tony Marcum

      In one sentence you say, “This kinda articles [sic] are always written by the people who are not objective and are not facts [sic] but personal opinions.”

      You go on to say:

      “…”but I think it’s just not appropiate [sic].”

      If you have to say, I think… then this is your opinion.

      The true fact of the matter is, despite any research study, despite your opinion, and despite any other jaded and faded woman or man who sneers at this because of some unhealed past hurt, it’s simply none of your business.

      We each live our life and we live it how we want regardless of what you or any other jaded person might think. The fact that you found this article is telling. I suspect, someone significant to you is dating someone much younger, and it’s destroying you. Get over it, and go out and do what is right for you!

      I’m divorced from a woman who turned out to be a narcissistic man hater, and she was older than me, yet acted like a 5 year old emotionally. How did she raise her kids? To be narcissists who could not treat a woman any age with a shred of decency and respect.

      Every single woman my age that I have interacted with is jaded and only concerned with her needs and what she can get. Why in the world would I ever want to be involved with that?

      So to older jaded women, get over yourself and realize that all men are not the same. Stop being crazy, and this judgment is the very evidence. Raise your boys to be respect women, and may you can compete with the younger non-jaded women.

      • Irene Petty

        Have you ever listened to Tom Leykis?
        He just about sums up older men for me.
        Younger men seem to be kinder, and have less judgement.

        • Clean Willie

          There’s your problem. Leykis is a grade A, wife abusing douchebag. Why anyone would listen to him is beyond me.

          • GetItGoing

            Why anyone would listen to him?

            Because he’s smart and says the truth, no matter how much you may like it. And calling him names is another example of why people like you are weak. There is nothing to support your claim that he is “wife abusing.”

            Ridiculous and childish comment.

        • Cliff Eden Gardner

          Until we continuously get effed over and we just say forget it.

        • Michael Laman

          Tom Leykis and I are the same age. I enjoy his broadcasts, but I don’t accept many of the things he says. Anyone with 4 failed marriages has some issues I think. He does offer realistic advice to younger men that I wish I’d had when I was in my 20s. The hardest thing all of us have a tough time with is: aging. 20-30 goes fast, and after that every decade really flies by. I’m now 61, and many of the people I knew male and female only 20 yrs. ago are dead already.
          Too many of us are taught to put marriage and relationships off–huge mistake. Don’t do it–I quit dating at 46 because where I live I simply could not find one person interested in me or anyone w/o serious baggage issues. Choose carefully where you live as a single-your dating pool will be a reflection of that region. I lived for my job not my life, and I was never living where I could meet quality people. It’s hard to believe how tough it is to sell yourself after 40 in the dating world until you’ve gone through it. Don’t do that–it’s gonna be a nightmare. The only older men I see women chasing are guys who are high status and high income men–own a business, doctors, lawyers, CEOs, and so on. Most guys don’t fall into that group, the average guy has his best picks early in life. After 30 unless he moves up in life, it’s slim pickings from then on. No one gets younger or prettier over time, so guys go after all the girls you can when you’re young, the choices will really depress you after 30. How many times I wish I could start over. I never thought being older meant being a social outcast.

    • Tiffany

      I believe that age is just a number. Older men make great companions with younger women.

      • Sue Donnem

        And vice versa. We older women are having fun with younger men.

    • Jaded satyr

      Well, whatever Emory University says must be true, right?

    • Caroline Hatake

      My parents age gap was huge and their relationship lasted more than her previous relationships with guys of her age.
      I guess it’s more prejudice than truth. Many young couples get married and then they divorce quickly nowadays. It’s not about age.

      It’s all about opinion. Oddly enough younger guys harassed me and I felt disgusted. Still it’s about maturity.

      “It’s not moral to date someone who has the age of to be your father”. Most men I would date would still younger than my father, no problem. lol It looks very bias of your part, sound like “it’s not moral a christian to date an ahteist”, “it’s not moral a white to date a non white”, “it’s not moral a poor to date a rich” goes on…

    • Eric Thomson

      You are Soooooo wrong. Just say it. You prefer immature men.

    • primetime2123

      Its most likely that you are a carnie Wilson lookalike that no attractive older men are interested. Why would a young woman complain about having attractive older men as options…unless those men aren’t interested ?

    • SheRa

      I would say it is more of a matter of preference than socially taboo. Obviously the parties in question should both be of legal consenting age, but if a 25 year old wants to date or marry a 55 year old, who the heck cares? If they’re happy and in love, what is the problem? The age gap is their issue to deal with, not yours.

      Also, you may not like being approached by older men but if they’re classy about it, stay classy, too. You can turn them down with a smile and thank them for the compliment. Being nice has no age limit.

  • alex

    Men will screw anything. Im above average looking abd i was also once average looking. Made no difference. In fact these days im an escort pulling in many high profile/famous clients but even my more average looking escort friends are pulling them in too, just half as often. Your entire comment is bullshit and its not surprising. Mens only talent, and half assed at that, is manipulation.

  • Tiffany

    I am 33 and I absolutely love being with an older man. I have a 59 year old guy friend and we have so much fun together. Older men know what they want, they please us younger women in every way, and they are true gentlemen. Older men are amazing, they understand how to love a woman, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. An older man knows how to hold a younger woman when she needs to be held and puts in time which is why we younger women nowadays prefer a much older man.

    • nyny3a

      Yes!

  • Stevie Jay Elmm

    As a man in his 30’s I honestly love talking to older women. Not because of the fantasy the media makes it out to be or the movie/porn industry but the reality to me is many women I talk to over 40 got it together and it’s no games. Girls in their 20’s act worse than teenage girls (I got plenty of both in my family around me to know) Girls around my age are okay but many of them still single are looking for the perfect man and judgemental. Women I know over 40 and hey almost 60 just are sexy, smart, work, independent etc. I know not all but a lot I speak to. Whether it’s to date or just strike up a casual conversation I love the company and maturity. I just got out of a long term relationship with a women my age and it had ups and downs but her maturity was all over the place and her rules with her life and a relationship life was childish. Difference between being young at heart and silly at times and just straight out childish.

    • JBWodehousian

      You are awesome. 🙂

  • Monkeywrench542 .

    I am a 55 year old man, currently dating a 24 year old lady for the last 16 months. I treat her as a lady and do not mind doing things that men should do for ladies. she was taken aback by them when i 1st started dating her, and now does not complain when i do them for her. we both love each other and enjoy doing lots of the same things together.

  • VictorErimita

    Third wave feminism set out to destroy the masculine, and it has largely succeeded among the generation of males that have been pathologized since birth. So, thank your enlightened sistren for bequeathing this dating scene to you.

    • bunny

      lmao well if a couple of unruly females was all it took to make that happen, then maybe it’s natural selection.

    • hrgls

      No. Feminism was created to destroy the family and curb population growth. “After overpopulation ran out of control, the female mice in John Calhoun’s “mouse universe” experiment stopped breeding, and the male mice withdrew from the company of others entirely, eating, sleeping, feeding and grooming themselves but doing little else. They had shiny coats, but empty lives.
      Never before in history have relations between the sexes been so fraught with anxiety, animosity and misunderstanding…..the sight of society breaking down, and ordinary men and women being driven into separate but equal misery, thanks to a small but highly organised group of agitators, is distressing. Particularly because, as increasing numbers of social observers are noticing, an entire generation of young people—mostly men—are being left behind in the wreckage of this social engineering project.”

      • rocco71

        You’re both correct.

  • Rock

    so, I know this article came out years ago and there seem to be a whole bunch of comments by older men, I imagine patting themselves on the back. But I think this article is a bit one sided. Why do female Millennials think male Millennials behave a certain way? I’ll tell you why. Because for a majority of the young males, their douchy, lack of ambitious attitude works. For those of us in the minority, I’m talking about smart, strong, manly millennials who were raised old school by parents who taught us not to do our best, but to be the best, we’re treated like actual lions in a zoo. People think we’ll we’re cool. They want to come see us, but they’re afraid to don’t get too close.

    And then what happens? We grow up and become like the older men patting themselves on the back like those in this comment section. We’re not dumb or oblivious. We see the glaring contradictions in today’s mainstream society, the masculinity everyone and their mother’s is trying to snuff out. We hope we can find women our own age who isn’t hypocritically superficial, but we’re realistic to the idea that we probably won’t find a decent woman with a good head on her shoulders until we’re in our mid thirties and she probably has a couple of kids that we have to “accept” in order to be with her. These aren’t complaints. It’s sad. But what are going to do? cry about it? Nope. We keep our head up and handle our business. Whether we find “love” or not doesn’t matter. We’re still going to do what we set out to accomplish.

    • Чак Саныч

      Women come and go. Concentrate on you and your future. Don’t forget to take at least a purple pill but the red one is the key nowadays.

    • tomclarke

      Obsession with masculinity and feminism among a relatively small subset of the male population is one of the most interesting cultural phenomena of the last few years.

    • hrgls

      It’s all socially engineered. Even you cool guys are simply part of the plan.

  • bull123

    This entire argument is being made from a woman’s point of view and I reject the premise of how millennial men are being characterized

    I have two nephews aged 21 and 23 and they want absolutely nothing to do with women right now….they say the women their age that they know are selfish, self-centered, demanding, and plain outright arrogant and unpleasant…they do have some women friends, but have NO desire to be in any kind of relationship with them, as they say they are all “crazy”

    Be assured they are still swayed by a pretty face, but tell me after 5 minutes of listening to these girls start talking about themselves, they want to throw up

    And BTW…my nephews are totally confident in who they are and are very happy going to college and hanging out with their buddies…they would like a family one day, but are in absolutely no hurry

    The millennial women are the problem folks, not the men

    • Kate Indigo

      Millennial men really aren’t a catch, either. No gender is worse than the other. Can’t tell you how many narcissistic whinny blame the women millennial men I have met. It is never their faults for anything. Reality is a good amount of millennial men are douchy, uneducated, lack class and taste and don’t have much ambition for anything. So, in reality both genders suck, but then again men always think they are innocent and nothing wrong with them. Can’t tell you how many men I have that it was my fault for thing. I have no desire to be with millennial men becuase well a lot of them suck and it isn’t worth it. I’ll be friends with them but not worth a date. Small portion of each gender in this generation are decent. I will agree that a lot of millennial women are the way your nephews describe but going around saying men aren’t the problem is a joke.

    • hrgls

      I would agree. But there are also normal young women out there. The same is true of the young men. This isn’t a gender issue. It’s a cultural and moral decay issue that affects both sides. The attraction for some women to older men is simply that those men still represent what we once had.

      • Love Witch

        I agree. It is less of a gender issue, and more of a cultural issue. Millennial boys and girls are oddly the same, and both genders mirror each other’s behaviors, standards and what they find acceptable. I read another article, similar to this one, which talked about millennial boys and their overused “coffee dates.” Although the author was complaining about it, there was a large amount of millennial girls, in the comment section, who were disagreeing with the author, and in favor of these cheap cop-out coffee dates. I think the millenial dating culture Is just lazy and low quality.

        • Bill

          It is interesting that a traditional date (you know, pick her up, take her out to dinner and perhaps a fun activity, maybe pay for the entire date if it went well) is almost completely obsolete today. I’ve actually recently found this out the hard way. It seems like there is too much “pressure” for girls to meet a guy for dinner and that it is too serious of a situation to be in.

          I hate the notion of a coffee date. I think it decreases the likeliness that one can convey genuine attraction in a building where 20 or so other people are talking around you. Plus they typically last about 45 minutes and then it abruptly ends.

          Women might complain about coffee dates and say they genuinely desire real authentic dates. But as you said in the article you read, reality says otherwise. The problem lies in the fact that women refuse to invest in men anymore. They want the coffee date, but they want channing tatum to walk through the door, regardless of what they have to offer themselves.

          • Michael Laman

            Women today don’t need men like they once did. They have careers, can start a family w/o a husband and so on. Men are now on the edge of the family unit. 2 books to read–Men On Strike and Save the Males are great to get a better view of men’s place in our society today. Women can now be very choosy about who they want, when they want to settle down, or remain single. Men die sooner usually, so we have biological urgency to find our mates or lose out. Dating today vs. dating in my teens over 40 yrs. is so different. Many of my female high school classmates got educated and never married. I’m not surprised–read Lori Gottlieb’s book Marry Him on this topic. I think men under 40 today will have a great struggle finding a partner for marriage anymore. Dating is too much like a job interview–it just isn’t fun anymore.

          • SheRa

            I think you’ve hit the nail on the head about not wanting to invest. A big portion of the issue is that people (men and women alike) are so worried about wasting their time on the wrong person that a coffee date is the perfect compromise for them. Basically, they’re saying, “Until I deem you worthy, you’re not worth my time.” Whereas years ago the thought was more, “Because I want to find out if you are worthy, I want to take my time.” One shows the selfishness of the generation and the other shows the emphasis on finding a compatible mate.

          • Bill

            It seems to me that its basically a breakdown in standards and investment. When a woman is not concerned with her standards, the men she’s willing to invest in are typically bozos that they won’t care about losing. They wont invest in men of higher standard who they would be heartbroken if they lost. They can invest in these dweebs that offer no real return and feel good about themselves, even if they wasted time. Because of course there will just be another guy waiting around the corner.

            Men at the same time are now investing in themselves and really its a win win. its becoming that way for me the more I invest in myself. The only people who really lose out from third wave feminism and then female empowerment movement is women.

            If women have no real standards or desire to commit to quality men, who can they really blame when their 30’s hit and they still aren’t married. It’s definitely not the “toxic males” or the immature peter pans they willingly dated…..

    • Michael Laman

      Tell your nephew to date while they wait to find the right person. After 30 their prospect pool won’t be very inviting. Your 20s is the best decade to find the right person. I’m 61, and in hindsight that was the time I met the best person I could have married. Being a student and poor made me pass her up–I still regret it to this day. She was everything I ever wanted in a partner and I met her at work. I never got that lucky again.

  • Michael

    ALL boys are born of women – no?
    Men since the industrial revolution are almost exclusively raised by women.
    Educated at least in primary school by women.
    Young men are harangued in college by harridans at every turn….
    and then in the workplace if they can even find employment…
    And yet they complain about these very men they have created!
    When the wall finally looms large, the woman’s SMV does a fast fade, and the biological clock chimes loud….
    now they look to an older MAN for a father for children, comfort, stability.

    Welcome to the feminist paradise.

    HAHAHAHA!

    • hrgls

      Apparently you’re not in the MAN category as your response is somewhat antagonistic (whiny) when it doesn’t need to be. But let’s use your logic for a minute. Who created the industrial revolution? Oh, right, men. Who are the perpetrators of war which leave so many boys without fathers. Oh, yeah. Men. In fact “feminism” was actually a movement created – actually socially engineered – by a group of elitist men. Harridans? Maybe you reap what you sow.

      • Michael

        Any whine you might hear originates in your mind. Projection.
        Is ANYTHING I stated untrue?
        I simply presented a set of facts.
        BTW I’m one of the older guys enjoying the company of younger women.

  • Thomas Horan

    You’re describing the difference between a generation of men, and a generation of boys raised by their mothers.

  • daveinaustin2012

    What a horribly written, trashy, inaccurate paragraph!

    “But there are downsides to large age disparities, and women in particular sacrifice a great deal when they make this choice. Child-bearing and rearing becomes complicated, not to mention the potential for earlier onset of age-related medical challenges, as well as confronting constant social stigma. It’s all pretty inconceivable in the long term, and yet it’s happening all the same.”

  • rustbucketblues

    I reckon anyone who uses a dating app is a boring, gutless loser.
    Whatever about some fancying older blokes, I’d say more women fancy married blokes, of any age. In certain bars and clubs, single men who want to improve their chances wear wedding rings.

  • Les Morpions

    The reason is that millennials are for the most part, inept, sheltered, overly sensitive, self aggrandizing narcissists expecting a free ride or a hand up when they are already on top of the world and can’t see it.

    Millennial “men” are mostly pantywaists. The “women” are not anything a sane man would want to consort with

    • Brittany Ericksen

      “In a 2010 paper published in Perspectives on Psychological Science and titled “It Is Developmental Me, Not Generation Me,” Brent W. Roberts. Grant Edmonds, and Emily Grijalva write:
      First, we show that when new data on narcissism are folded into preexisting meta-analytic data, there is no increase in narcissism in college students over the last few decades. Second, we show, in contrast, that age changes in narcissism are both replicable and comparatively large in comparison to generational changes in narcissism.
      Basically, it’s not that people born after 1980 are narcissists, it’s that young people are narcissists, and they get over themselves as they get older. It’s like doing a study of toddlers and declaring those born since 2010 are Generation Sociopath: Kids These Days Will Pull Your Hair, Pee On Walls, Throw Full Bowls of Cereal Without Even Thinking of the Consequences. Further, they write: In turn, when older people are told that younger people are getting increasingly narcissistic, they may be prone to agree because they confuse the claim for generational change with the fact that younger people are simply more narcissistic than they are. The confusion leads to an increased likelihood that older individuals will agree with the Generation Me argument despite its lack of empirical support.
      Hahaha, you doddering old confused fools! Generation Abe Simpson!”
      http://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2013/05/me-generation-time/315151/

      • Les Morpions

        Does that explain why at age 30+ they still act like petulant , self absorbed children? No, it doesn’t. Nobody says they are More Narcissistic, they just don’t seem to grow out of it. This is why we have to equip our offices with cereal dispensers and hammocks so the Millennials can decompress in the middle of the day. They simply can’t put in a full day of work without two recess periods, Kool-aid and crackers..

        • Brittany Ericksen

          you don’t know every one of them. i Highly doubt you’ve ever earned a full academic scholarship unlike me lol.. you don’t seem like someone who gives a damn about how many people of every generation are abused and the long term consequences that has on their lives (if they’re still living). some have been murdered or committed suicide of course. and then there are some that are far more successful than you. 😀 truth is you only sound like a hater, and you don’t know more than the researchers i mentioned. your hateful and ignorant little opinion will never be regarded more highly than their valuable work and information. have a great summer 😛

          • Les Morpions

            It’s great that you seem to think very highly of yourself and your part-time resort hotel waitress gig. Good luck.

      • Les Morpions

        Does that explain why at age 30+ they still act like petulant , self absorbed children? No, it doesn’t. Nobody says they are More Narcissistic, they just don’t seem to grow out of it. This is why we have to equip our offices with cereal dispensers and hammocks so the Millennials can decompress in the middle of the day. They simply can’t put in a full day of work without two recess periods, Kool-aid and crackers…

  • Austin Kennedy

    Scientifically Women should marry men 6 years older than themselves.

  • MrP

    10 years ago , a 24 yr old young woman told me I was too old for her

    10 years later I would now consider her too old for me

    • Andrew Payne

      This is beautifully put.

  • Scott Sevits

    8 months ago a 36 year old told me I was to old for her and too close to her 60 y/o dad’s age. if millennial women want older boyfriends I am not seeing it. I used to want kids but don’t think I would be comfortable dating a woman half my age. I tried online dating but too many fake or dusingenuine woman on dating sites and too many ask for money before ever meeting. seems that most women care more for status, money and material things than love and romance. I have pretty much given up on finding love and will most likely spend the rest of my life alone.

    • primetime2123

      No offense you aren’t good looking enough that young women would choose you over younger men. By the looks of it , you probably aren’t rich enough to make up for your looks. You have to go for women your own age unfortunately

      • Scott Sevits

        I prefer women that aren’t shallow and materialistic and only looked at women 30 and above. I prefer closer to my age but I have no kids and wanted at least one of my own. because of how shallow and heartless women are I gave up that recently as well as trying to date because woman just aren’t worth it anymore. i never said I was the best looking guy in the world either.

        • primetime2123

          All women are shallow and materialistic. You need some serious LMS to date much younger women in your 50s.

          • Scott Sevits

            LMS?? exactly why are you targeting me? i was simply posting about an experience i had last year after trying to date a year after a breakup nothing more nothing less. How old are you? You know nothing about me at all, of what I have over come in life or the person i am. You have insulted me and for what??

          • primetime2123

            Im not insulting you. Im telling you the truth. Younger women do like older men. You might not be one of those men though

          • Scott Sevits

            I never said I was the type that younger women would want. You didn’t have to cruelly point that out on a public forum. btw, are you man or woman and how old?

          • primetime2123

            not sure why you are getting butt hurt. Im just telling my opinion. maybe Im wrong and maybe younger women do like you. keep trying to see if Im wrong. but you can’t really judge that by one woman.

          • Scott Sevits

            you are wrong,the fact that you hide who you are and your age makes your opinions invalid. You attack insult other people and think it’s ok, well it isn’t. you need to grow up and learn respect. I am not hurt, I am angry that someone would react the way you have to an experience i had not with a young 20 something woman but a woman pushing 40. maybe you do t get rejected or turned away much but that’s all I have ever known. I am a great guy and a good person. You have know right to judge others if you ate willingto reveal yourself and open yourself up to ridicule and criticism. I wasn’t complaining about a woman saying I was old just point I g out that women will do that to men regardless of how old they are.

          • primetime2123

            im just trying to give you advice. if you want younger women you need to improve your status and money situation. You have to be really really handsome if you don’t have those things.

          • Scott Sevits

            first off your advice wasnt asked for so keep it to yourself. second, as much as I appreciate honesty even brutal honesty, unless I ask for your opinion don’t give me one. please do not respond further and I do t need help from insensitive people like you.i will also not allow you to bring me down to push yourself up or to make you feel good about yourself. lastly if that’s the way women are and want to be screw them all!!!! they aren’t worth my love or my time!

          • Lucas_D

            All women are shallow and materialistic.

            That should have been your tipoff right there. Whoever this jerk is, he’s not interested in giving you advice; he’s looking for a way to be rude and nasty to people with no risk of getting his little troll face punched in.

            As for advice that can help, I’d suggest changing the places you’re looking. You’re much more likely to run into the shallow types in bars and clubs, so I’d rule those out completely.

          • Scott Sevits

            I should have known better, but I foolishly engaged him because I felt insulted and attacked. my mistake was also to post on a feed like this.

          • Lucas_D

            That’s another problem. Online dating isn’t the panacea it’s made out be, and too often it’s packed with people who have ludicrously high expectations and won’t settle for less than a perfect 10. They don’t seem to realize that most 10’s don’t need online dating to begin with, and there’s a looooooong line for the few who do.

            Now, I won’t patronize you by saying that you just “need to have confidence”. I hate that cliche, because it’s like telling someone below the poverty line that they just need to have money. There’s really no easy way to do it, I’m afraid; kind of like money, you can’t just choose to have it, you have to come by it honestly.

            Best thing to do? Think of something you enjoy, and then look up where other people who love to do the same things might hang out. Focus on having a good time first and foremost; the sooner you can become happy with just being who and what you are, the sooner you’ll find somebody else who sees that in you appreciates it.

          • Scott Sevits

            You are so right about online dating. I have found more fake women on dating sites, they chat You up for a week or so then ask for money and god forbid you say no. I have been scammed once, after failing to find the person i was seeking I decided to try n.s.a. as an option. that was another huge letdown, single women always wanting me to verify I was safe to meet, couples always wanting well hung younger men,
            the couples my age(50+) I am 51 never responded back despite claiming they wanted someone their age. I started to lose confidence in myself because i couldn’t measure up to what anyone wanted. Finally I gave up on my dream of being a dad and have all but given up on love. I am ok but still continuing to rebuild my confidence. thank you very much for advice and kind words.

          • Michael

            Scott I was thrown back into the dating pool at 50. Married the only girl I eve dated and she just walked out after 31 yrs. Was depressed after all what woman wants a 50 something balding guy. Turns out if you don’t drink to excess, don’t hit, financially above water there is an enormous pool of available women out there of all ages. BTW if you are going bald then shave it all off. My son had to harangue me into doing it but the ladies definitely like it better that way.

            Go buy the book “No More Mr. Nice Guy” by Dr. Robert Glover RIGHT NOW (title kinda sucks but once you get there it will all make sense) and definitely join his website

            http://www.nomoremrniceguy.com/forums/

            Also read “The Body Keeps the Score” !

            You may have to kiss a lot of toads to find your princess (which can definitely be fun)

            99% is being fully confident and happy with yourself!

          • Scott Sevits

            Thanks. I don’t drink, smoke or do drugs, I don’t hit women and I am not balding. I work 2 jobs, but still struggle at times but am working to resolve that. I was supposed to go out with a 34 year old last weekend but it didn’t happen but she still want to go out with me so that’s good.

          • Caitlin Rosenfeld-Cioffi

            I am one of those Millennials! My friend and I only date older men. Stay positive guys and don’t make too many hasty generalizations 🙂 xoxo

          • Andrew Payne

            Scott Sevits, there are going to be rude, sick people where ever you go. You handled this primetime clown with class. Don’t get discouraged. You will succeed. I am 52.

          • Scott Sevits

            Thanks. I actually was supposed to have gone out with a 34 year old yesterday but things didn’t work out. I am ok though. at least her saying yes gives me hope.

          • Andrew Payne

            Heck, that she said yes to you gives ME hope! Maybe there’s a girl who wants children out there for me, too. Keep at it.

          • Nikolas Watson

            He is right though,

          • Mark Anthony Hampton

            I’m certainly not here to insult anyone, male or female. i believe modern younger women are intrigued by (attracted to…?? maybe) by older men that they can’t exactly figure out. I’m 62, haven’t had a ‘girl/woman – friend in years. I ride a bike to work, very active, high metabolism, “try” to eat well, etc.. young women at work are always asking, ‘where do you hangout?” (One just walked by now) Scott, they don’t want long term relationships with us. They want stories to tell their girlfriends of how they met this older man for drinks, tapas, etc.,etc. GIVE THEM A STORY TO TELL. I love women, foreign and domestic..haha! Women of Spain (Madrid, for the sake of this conversation) made it very clear what attracts them and a good portion, I’d wager, of the young women that you’re attracting. ‘Friday business-casual’ should be every older man’s uniform. Whether it’s going to happy hour or to the corner store for a six-pack. They notice that you’re not wearing flipflops, cargo pants, etc., plaid shirts. (Young men actually wear those things on dates!?!?) A previous poster actually hit it on the mark.. Cultivate a look that attracts younger women from the European continent and, believe it or not, everything else will fall into place.

          • goat10000

            I’ve 55 and I’ve been dating 18-22s. They like me. I don’t fully understand it, but I’m not complaining.

          • Steve55

            Get out of here with that BS bro! That’s an idiotic statement. You can only pull that off on a regular basis in certain foreign countries.

        • Steve55

          Scott , it’s not your fault . It’s you location that’s the problem. See http://www.happierabroad.com

    • Michael Laman

      Don’t despair Scott–after 50 most American men have limited dating options left. I tried online dating a few years ago. I’m 61 now. 2 different websites gave me no results–Match.com is the worst. Avoid it at all costs. I had 1400 views of my profile, I contacted 40, 10 responded, and not one would even meet for a cup of coffee. These were all women over 50, I was 58. Even dating in my age range yielded dismal responses. Moral–you must date all you can under 40, after that the prospect pool is small and not promising. Online dating sites are full of recycled inactive users or fake profiles–you will waste your time sifting through junk. Try to meet someone via an activity or hobby. Dating over 50 for both sexes is mostly an ordeal in frustration and disappointment. Try it on if you like, I found it not worth the effort any longer.

      • Scott Sevits

        I agree with you about dating over 50, I am 51. it surprised me on that I don’t consider myself dead or undesirable but most women seem to treat men over 50 like they are. it is extremely frustrating and makes one wonder what happened to women, now a days they seem more interested in status,money and looks
        which don’t always last rather than love that when cultivated right lasts forever. I am not concerned about dating anymore as I have given up on dating and finding someone and given up on having kids because women have judged me unworthy for so long that I believe i must be. i refuse to be hurt by them anymore. all of this makes me question the character of American women today.

        • Michael Laman

          All you do Scott is put yourself out there and hope for the best.
          I’m 61, and I lost a great career due to colon cancer five years ago. Dating is last thing I worry about now. It’s over, and survival is my most urgent need.

          • Scott Sevits

            I am sorry about your cancer issue and please make a good fight and survive this. I had been talking to a 34 year old, we were supposed to go out 2 weeks ago but it fell through. we kept talking and I found out tonight our work s schedules won’t allow us to be able to date. I am not going to put myself out there because it’s not worth it. I guess men over 50 are worthless when it comes to love. we might as well be dead. I am just completely giving up on love.
            ladies you win!!!

          • Steve55

            The US is a culture that values youth whereas in non western countries the old are revered, valued and respected. I read x pat forums and guys in their 50’s and even 60’s are easily dating and banging women 25-40 yrs old all day long . In the US old people are practically put out to pasture. Google the subject of how different societies treat the old and you will see this. Also, dating studies show that American women in particular absolutely hate to date men much older than themselves whereas in non western cultures It is a preference.

        • Steve55

          Regarding your comment “all this make sense me question the character of American women today”, amen brotha. What you and other guys need to understand is that most women of the world are totally different than American women. It is true that dating is near impossible after 40 in America, I’ve done all the dating sites and like you, for every 100 messages I send , maybe 10 reply and they ALWAYS dissapear for no reason. American women are e most flaky in the world and will get turned off and dump you for the smallest little thing . Many experts articles are abound that talk about this finickiness and pickiness and impossible to meet demands they have in men. Trust me brothas, women of non western countries are where it’s at. Why waste away at home in the US when you could be having your choice in women abroad? Women of non western countries really strongly desire to have a man in their life and will appreciate you. And a 10-20 year age gap is nothing to them and 10 years is actually preferred. And the women are generally hot and very feminine instead of masculinized. And there is no obesity epidemic abroad either so there isn’t intense competition for women with good bodies like there is here in America . A guy who can usually date a 6 in the US can date a 8 or 9 abroad . There is a major shortage of men in non western countries too so it’s pretty easy to get a girlfriend or wife . At home in America I average 1 date a year despite year round efforts, but every country I’ve bben to abroad, I can literally date 7 days a week if I wanted to. Foreign women make great wives too and if you google it, you’ll see that there is only a 20% divorce rate when American men marry foreign women (per the USCIS too) vs the 50% divorce rate if you marry an American woman. For those who say foreign women just want you for your money, I say “and what do you think American woman want”? Think about it! That part is the same where ever you go and fact is foreign ladies are far less materialistic. And whatever country you go to, it’s not hard to find women who speak English. You can filter for English speaking only at online dating sites. I don’t understand men who would rather be lonely than go abroad and have tons of options.

          • Scott Sevits

            i admit I prefer Asian women. but
            I can’t afford to travel or evenbri g someone here. I do t lime long distance relationships either. I would rather be lonely then give women any more chances to hurt me. I just don’t feel any woman is worth the hassle. i am done looking for love because it doesn’t exist anymore.

          • Steve55

            Man o man, you have no idea how humbleness and sweet Filipinas are. Filipinas will not hurt any man, trust me. They will truly accept a man for who he is as long as he is nice. Please try getting on to cherry blossoms and see what the chats are like. Filipinas always say “looking for a man to accept me for who I am”, and they are spiritual always saying “god willing” and “god bless” and most prefer a man 15-20 years older. You can see this a true cherry blossoms dating site where half of the filipinas in their mid 20’s put 40 as the min age of their match , generally 40-65 , sometimes up to 70. They truly love older men, it’s in their culture to respect older people. You will find sexy and beautiful Filipinas deny their beauty if you tell them they are beautiful. When I asked one filipina why they do that she says “so as to not make our head big , we pass the glory on to others” .

          • Behr Palomo

            I’d much your finances but I found it cheaper to live overseas in places like Thailand than living here in the USA (CA). I saved thousands every winter by leaving the country.

            It’s really worth it to save $2,000 if you can that’s all you need for a month in Thailand: airfare, food, drink, ground transportation, massages, fun outings and more.

            Sorry to hear you are giving up. That might be part of your problem with women; they usually want a confident man who takes control of life.

          • Scott Sevits

            I never wanted to give up, but women have made it clear i will never be whst they want. i only wanted to love and be loved and to have a family and women said no by choosing to ignore,reject and put me in tbe friend category.
            i am a good man with a big heart.
            i refuse to be arrogant or cocky but since thsts whst women want i have no chance at all because tbst isnt me or who i am. if women cant see thst i am a great guy then screw them all!!!

          • inspirelead

            Man, don’t think like that. If you have a good heart, then maybe you are just looking in the wrong places or approaching the wrong women. You should really try going after women who look a whole lot younger than they are. I really don’t think there is much hope in finding a long term partner in someone who hasn’t experienced life yet unless you are just as immature as them. I don’t think a woman really appreciates or recognizes a good man until after they’ve been through a few bad ones. I don’t know why God blessed me with youthful looks but some people think I am as young as 18 even though I am in my 30s. There is a young looking woman out there for you, just make sure you look for her qualities not just her looks. I never get with guys because of their looks or their money. I fall in love with their character and I know that if you are more selective, you’ll probably find the right one. There are good and bad on both sides of the coin.

          • DeenaE

            Yes go to China or India there’s loads of single women dying to get with someone 20+ years of age. Gawd you are such a douche your take on American women no wonder you have to buy foreign women. American women bring more to the table than most women around the world. We are the primary caretakers, paycheck earners, intelligent and independent. Sorry that intimidates you or you can’t live up to being with an equal.

          • Swagman

            Yeah, the “more to the table” is precisely what Steve55 is rightly pointing out – it’s mostly negative traits that you “bring.” His comment wasn’t intended as a screed against you but a helpful suggestion for the men here. You expect men to continue denying the reality smacking them in the face every day attempting to date in America, simply bc you are insecure and think you are a great catch.

          • Michael Laman

            DeenaE–you may be right, but are you happy? that is all that counts in the end.

          • Ken Dier

            That is a great point. So much game playing here and then there is so many scammers. Most times you e-mail back and forth things are going great then they drop the bomb. You might have actually been talking to a guy the whole time just trying to take your money.

          • Michael Laman

            My brother married a girl from Thailand. She is 20 yrs. younger. They have 2 kids, she became a nurse here. He is retired Navy, and spent 20yrs. overseas. He married in his early 40s. They are doing great, and if I could start again–I’d go overseas to Europe for a spouse. Marriage in America is under so much siege–it’s hard to find anyone M or F who can or will hang in there and make it work for life. Too many people today grow up with broken families. They have never seen a successful happy marriage role model.

        • Jorge Valdes

          First of all Scott let me respond to your earlier post. A 38 year old woman is NOT a Millenial. Millenials refer to men and women who are currently in their late teens – very early 30s but more specifically to the years in between that range. Secondly, in the words of Hitch “Any man can sweep any girl off their feet you just have to have the right broom” Meaning you must have class, well dressed, well groomed and always have to be charming and friendly. Women like compliments. Yea you have to have game (to use the correct Millenial terminology). My 80 year old Dad has no scruples and is always hitting (or as he says complimenting both young and older women and they seem to find it cute and sweet) I find it displeasing but what do I know He actually has more game that I do, Oh and all the while he is in his very own relationship which embarrassed his ladyfriend but she knows it is his way of being. And I am here not having the same luck. Oh well.

          • Scott Sevits

            i didnt mean to imply tgat a 36 y/o was a millenial. i was attempting to show that even women pushing 40 will claim a man is too old for her if he is 10 + years older.

        • Behr Palomo

          Srsly, take some time to go to Thailand, hang out w some girls there. $800 RT flight, rooms cheap as $5/night (basic) or $20(prime), food is same, like $3-$4/meal, $2 beers.

          For the price of dating an American woman for a month, you can vacation in Thailand for a month and date 4+ women. You don’t even have to focus on dating, there’s a ton of fun stuff to do there and amazing sights and the visa is free/30 days.

        • Ken Dier

          Yeah, I’m having the same problem. Women at first seemed interested but they never follow through. Scott and Michael, both of you look like pretty good looking guys. I know it’s hard to tell by a small picture. I think many woman put in a very small profile just to “throw their hook in the water” When they catch a fish it just helps their ego but that’s all they were after in the first place. You are correct about dating sites putting in false profiles to make it look like they have a big selection. I think many are site moderators too.

    • c6869

      Scott, what others have said about Asian women is 100% correct. I’m 74 and when I was 51 I married a Thai lady who was 26 and for 22 years (going on 23) there has never been a disagreeable moment, not one single argument, not one single cross word and no I’m not a dictator but we live simple and equally we do not control each other and yes it has been equal in giving and taking. I would never, ever, even consider an American women again. Been there done that and hated every moment.

  • Rich Wild

    Only girls 18-25 seem to like me. Its ok by me. Many have fallen in love then get scared. The right one will come along and I do have a little money. Its like a girl with a nice body, it does help a little but not the only thing they want by any means.

  • Micha_Elyi

    I enjoy science fiction. I see the fiction, where’s the science?

  • Chad Fulton

    Same thing I get approached by women 18 to 25, say they just want to hang out. Lol I admit I’ve checked ID’s… No not complaining….

  • Michael Laman

    I wish this would happen to me. I had a lonely period in my 40s and 50s. Cancer forced me to retire at 56. A young female companion would be great right now since I have finally have lots of time to spend knowing her and doing things together.

  • Scott Sevits

    I really hope for your sake she means it. I don’t believe or trust any women anymore. I had hoped that some woman would probe me wrong as far as how I view all women. nope all women do is prove me right. I am so done with them it isn’t funny. I went through this crap when I was younger and really thought it would be different now. the way women treat me, I am ready to eat a bullet because it just hurts so much.

    • Steve55

      You haven’t tried women of NON WESTERN countries who haven’t been affected by feminism. Women not affected by feminism are far more caring , nurturing and sweet. Western women on average (not all, but generally speaking) tend to a bit cold and selfish and narcissistic, with only a very small portion not that way, mostly real Christian and small town ladies . It’s not their fault, it’s what American culture has done to them. That happier abroad website has a research section along the left side menu tab that has sourced links and book quotes by social psychologists stating that women in America account for the majority of the rise in narcissism in today’s narcissism epidemic. I still hit the bars and clubs on the weekends and man, the ladies now days are down right mean. Not just rude , and stuck up, but literally cold and mean. Not all of course , but many. But abroad they are always sweet and appreciative when you approach them, whereas American women often get angry and look at men as predator or creep just because he says hello to her at a bar . Bottom line , foreign women are different. As far as not having money money to travel, we all find a way for the things we want bad enough. International airfare isnt that much more than domestic airfares.

      • Scott Sevits

        look I don’t trust women period. they are all the same. I am not going to travel to Europe or Asia to find a woman. i am not intetested in long didtsnce relationships. i am glad you found someone, i have never been that lucky. i have dealt with some foreign wiman and they all cared about money and when i said noi got cussed out, called cheap, told i will never find someone and even called heartless. no thanks, but I am so done with women. I am tired of being hurt, treated like I am a joke and like I am not good enough or worthy enough. at this point I would rather cut my penis off than be with a woman. they are so undeserving of my love and time, and attention.

        • Steve55

          That’s fine bro. Although I’ve been replying to your posts , I guess I’m really addressing the guys out there who love women and still want to find a life partner but may have given up. To those future readers,, I have showed the alternative way that works.

          • Scott Sevits

            Sorry Steve, I do appreciate the Advice. I recently thought I found someone and once again things blew up in my face. I didn’t mean to take it out on you. women do make me feel lower than dirt and have all my life. alli ever wanted was to love and be loved and to have a family. At this point I don’t want to be alone but women have made that choice for me And I wont force someone to love me.

          • Michael

            Dude I gave you excellent learned the hard way advice and it appears you haven’t bothered to partake. You sound like a beat dog and I too can relate. BTDT. BUT you can be miserable OR you can chose to stop wallowing in self-pity and get up off your knees and do something useful. Read your crap and ask yourself is that guy someone you respect? I guarantee you the women reading here do not.. You MUST unlearned the BS society has fed you and take the red pill! I’ll bet IF you get a first date you barf out your life story and never get a second. No woman wouth having is going to want an Eeyore.

            You exhibit strong signs of;

            noun: learned helplessness a
            condition in which a person suffers from a sense of powerlessness, arising from a traumatic event or persistent failure to succeed. It is thought to be one of the underlying causes of depression.

            Got to http://www.nomoremrniceguy.com/forums/ RIGHT NOW and sign up and introduce yourself to your brothers.

            I agree completely with Steve55. Feminazis have really messed up women and western society in general – but then men let them do it. There are great women in other places.

          • Scott Sevits

            Thanks for tne advice but when you are like me and women have chosen to ignore you and not give you opportunities at love like the other guys around you always get and then reject you every time you actually try asking them out or put you in the friend zone how would you feel?? believe me I won’t hurt my self in any way but wo.ens attitudes toward men or me in general aren’t helping me feel any better about myself. I have had only 1 real relationship in my life. I am a good man bit women just dont see it. i can’t afford to travel to another country to find someone. I am just going to give upon love, it’s the only way for me not to hurt anymore.

          • Michael

            “Men are disturbed not by things, but by the view which they take of them.” Epictetus
            You are choosing to PLAY THE VICTIM. Your entire output here is po ‘lil me.

            Read the two books I recommended to you and change your life – or wallow in self-pity. You choose. Read Epictetus! There is nothing new under the sun! Do you think you are unique?

            Out of how many billions on earth?

            By doing nothing you are choosing to be nothing!
            If you want heat from the stove first you put in the fuel.
            The world doesn’t care about you.
            The world cares about what it can get from you.
            The world owes you nothing.
            Life’s not fair.

            You have learned helplessness. You have the power to unlearn.

            Women are very opportunistic. They have to be. Is how life works.
            Rear up on your hind legs and DO SOMETHING useful.
            You have to be the steel inside the velvet glove.

            When you offer something women find valuable they will find you.

          • Scott Sevits

            Do something?? I try to stay positive. All I ever wanted was to love and be loved and to realize my dream of being a dad. thanks to women I have been forced to give up on having kids and now stand ready to give up on lo e all together. how man chances do women get before beco.ing the unworthy ones?? I refuse to keep letting women treat me like I am lower than dirt. I want women to want me for me, not what I can do for or give them! that shouldn’t be too much to ask.

          • Michael

            Secret to life. Get knocked down X many times. Get up X+1 times.
            Did you even look at the website I recommended?
            Did you read even reviews of the two books I recommended?
            Clearly you have trauma to which the second book is a godsend.
            Take no action and continue to suffer. Act and the answers are out there.
            YOUR CHOICE. If you fail to act you are CHOOSING to FAIL.
            Have a day. Have a life.

          • Scott Sevits

            Trauma, you have no idea. I was molested at 14. at 19 i met a girl 4 years younger that I felt was who I was going to marry, i intended to wait for her to hrow up, but thanks to our mom’s we weren’t allowed to know or communicate with each other. I haven’t felt the way I felt for her towards anyone else. so yeah I got trauma and you think some book is going to make things ok?

          • Michael

            I know first hand it is a great place to start. Wish I had known about this book years ago.
            I also know taking action is frightening. Living a dead life is not living.

            Questions for you.

            (1) Do you think NOT reading the book is going to make your life better?
            (2)How many problems are solved by doing nothing?
            (3)Do you think you are the only person to have ever suffered something horrible? Child or otherwise?
            (4)Are you willing to do any work to make your own life better?

            “In contrast, children with histories of abuse and neglect learn that
            their terror, pleading, and crying do not register with their caregiver.
            Nothing they can do or say stops the beating or brings attention and
            help. In effect they’re being conditioned to give up when they face
            challenges later in life.


            Bessel A. van der Kolk,

            The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma

          • Ken Dier

            Hey Scott, know how to beat any of these woman? Backpage.com / personals/ woman seeking men . Don’t spend a dime on them if they play games. Go to the site above and get what you need. It will cost a few hundred now a days but it will help your outlook and when the woman play games you have an out.

          • Ken Dier

            My woman from Tokyo. Are they good from Japan?

          • Michael Laman

            I’m 61 and I quit dating women 15 years ago. It was too much hassle and disappointment. I live in Houston, a terrible place to date for anyone over 40. If I could, I’d go to Japan or Thailand and give it a shot. Filipina women are also fond of American men. Men in America have been devalued for decades now. Women really don’t need us anymore–either to start a family, raise children, or be a partner. I’ve seen the family unit breakdown since the late 60s, and this is one reason men are simply discarded today. Lots of guys fear divorce also since it’s such a tough economic setback. Before age 25 I met at least five women I would have been glad to marry. At that time I was in college and had no money to pursue them. When I finally had money, they were gone. I never met anyone after that I would consider for a partner. The good ones left early. All I found after 30 were misfits, leftovers, or players.

        • Micha_Elyi

          The female body is a life-support system for a shopper.

          • Swagman

            Lol

      • Michael Laman

        My brother married a girl from Thailand. He was ex-Navy 25 years, and she was ten or more years younger. They have two kids now, both teens, and their marriage seems to be going well. His wife got a nursing degree, and they seem to be very happy. I can’t think of too many of my American friends who can say the same about their marriage–first or second one at that.

  • Rich Lee

    It seems like the only dates I get lately are younger women. I guess they like the doting dad types. I’ve been through a few and they never seem to want a relationship. It’s like I’m just a way for them to feel more independent or equal with their parents in some way. They don’t picture themselves settling down with me. They just want to resolve something and then move on. I’m still trying to figure out exactly what it is they wanted from me in the first place. Figure that out and then maybe I can narrow in and find a way to keep them long term.

    • Behr Palomo

      No offense, more like trying to offer perspective, but just from this short comment, you sound like a pushover. On the other hand, you are probably a very caring and attentive partner. My experience is many (not all, please hold back the feminist indignation), but many women (esp younger) like a man to take control/charge. Not in an unhealthy controlling way, but in a leader/mentor confident type way.

      The other factor you touch on is younger people are still figuring out what they want to do, where they want to be, etc. it’s exploration time!

  • Jwi Sonceque

    Want to know what I find funny….the number of men in here like they are even interested in dating 40 ANYyear is women and are having to settle for younger. Lol
    Well guys Im in Atlanta, Wru?
    Since becoming single at 34, now 40, very FEW men MY age even attempt to talk to me. Oh they will stare as i walk up and by but won’t say a word!
    And if ONE MORE White man around my age @ a bar tells me he doesnt pay(which is always a lie if you date women) because HE decided I MUST be “working” if i engaged in a convo HE started….im going to scream! DUDE Im Not THAT much younger than you….I just LOOK that much younger than you.
    However, 25-35 are I my face all the time trying the hardest to prove they are sincere.
    If 39-55 is out there sincere in good shape and wanting to date 40 year old women….
    I wish he would do more than stare.

    My exhusband was 10.my elder. When we met I was 18.

    Want to know what I find funny….the number of men in here like they are even interested in dating 40 ANYyear is women and are having to settle for younger. Lol
    Well guys Im in Atlanta, Wru?
    Since becoming single at 34, now 40, very FEW men MY age even attempt to talk to me. Oh they will stare as i walk up and by but won’t say a word!
    And if ONE MORE White man around my age @ a bar tells me he doesnt pay(which is always a lie if you date women) because HE decided I MUST be “working” if i engaged in a convo HE started….im going to scream! DUDE Im Not THAT much younger than you….I just LOOK that much younger than you.
    However, 25-35 are I my face all the time trying the hardest to prove they are sincere.
    If 39-55 is out there sincere in good shape and wanting to date 40 year old women….
    I wish he would do more than stare.

    My exhusband was 10.my elder. When we met I was 18.

    • robtal

      Im 65, once you women pass 35 your done . The market place even denounces you. Face facts men with resources are not going to risk putting up with agendas, grief, monthly moods, dissatisfaction scows , and just plane old pissy attitude all the time. You have won baby but keep your unhappiness to yourself. And the world knows how unhappy you females are and the corner you have painted yourselves into.

    • inspirelead

      I can relate 100% with you. I am pushing 40 but look as young as 18 to some. I always end up with men at least 10 years older than me (sometimes twice) because like you said, men in my age range won’t even approach me.

      • Michael Laman

        Tom Leykis–radio host on West Coast says older women are seen in the same way as used cars–too much mileage and past their expiration date. I don’t agree at all, but I found it very hard to approach women in their 50s, I’m 61, since they always wanted younger. Everyone wants to age down in the dating game. Sorry–we all get old. Ladies please read–Marry Him by Lori Gottlieb. She raises one point–too many women squander their prime dating years, then after 35 or 40 they suddenly aren’t pursued. Why? The guys they should have gone after earlier in life are now gone. They got someone, and the ratio of single women to men rises with time. Mr. Leykis says women are basically a depreciating asset. After 4 divorces I guess he would know.

    • Michael Laman

      JWI–read the book Marry Him by Lori Gottlieb. She talks about your situation in her book. Good luck. As men age up, they tend to date down in age. Women at 40 plus are invisible. My sister told me, she is 63, men are attracted to fertility signs. As women age up, they lose that. I’m 62, and I’d be very glad to have a woman in her 40s as a partner. Why? If she is working, she is probably mature and responsible. Looks don’t matter as much with age–maturity and intelligence are what count with me. We all get old, and nature isn’t always kind as the years roll on.

  • jimmyk520000

    Reading the papers over the past several years there are a large number of school teachers with middle school boys as well.

  • c6869

    Message For Scott Sevits
    Scott, what others have said about Asian women is 100% correct. I’m 74 and when I was 51 I married a Thai lady who was 26 and for 22 years (going on 23) there has never been a disagreeable moment, not one single argument, not one single cross word and no I’m not a dictator but we live simple and equally we do not control each other and yes it has been equal in giving and taking. I would never, ever, even consider an American women again. Been there done that and hated every moment.

    • DeenaE

      Dude she’s waiting for you to die. Asian women have patience and are smart. Party party after you are gone.

      • c6869

        You might be correct but more likely she will die before me and we party all the time, have three kids and a mother pushing 100 with no illnesses a father who died over a 100 and I’m as health as a horse no HBP no illness, don’t catch colds never had the flu nada not one thing athletic perfect BP perfect blood work you name it. Live her family history I give her 20 more years

        • Paul F

          True LOVE!!

  • Micha_Elyi

    Why Millennial Women Want to Date Older Men

    $$$

  • robtal

    Pure bull Im 65 established ,nice looking ,trim, retired with home and all material needs paid off . Once women any age know you are free and not open to be manipulated or interested in being entangled and entrenched in a financial way with them , they have no interest.

    • inspirelead

      I think men who fit your description automatically think their status makes them wanted (what big ego you have). Ever thought that maybe there is something about you that turns them off? I once met a small business owner who spent a lot of time talking about how much money he made. But when I was struggling and didn’t have gas to come see him, he didn’t offer me one dime to help. Yet, I would give the shirt off my back to a stranger, whether I had a lot of money or was broke. Stop thinking your money is their motive and maybe one might stick with you.

    • Behr Palomo

      To paraphrase, women of any age have no interest in you.

      I am free, financially independent, etc, and women of various ages are interested in me. I will admit there are women who just don’t consider anyone outside of their personal parameters, be that 2 year age difference or 20, but that’s fine-> only a loser would want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with them. And yes, there’s a lot of gold diggers out there as well, and at 65 with not a lot to offer in the beautiful young face and body dept., maybe you shouldn’t be so stingy with the one of the main ways you could attract women: resources. Or maybe you don’t have anything to give anyone else, Just barely enough for yourself?

  • inspirelead

    Is this a man’s forum? I’m just asking because I see way more men who don’t know what they are talking about posting comments about their personal experiences as if they know everything about all women. I found this article because I was wondering why I always end up with men a lot older than me. And I didn’t expect to find a bunch of men crying about their bad choice in partners. Fyi – if you are old (60 +) and go after a baby who still hasn’t developed (20s or less), don’t expect her to be really interested in you, period. If you want to date someone younger, keep your eyes open for someone like me who looks young and attractive but is really 10 or 15 years older than they. Most guys I meet know I’m older after having a conversation with me.My appearance does not show my age but my character does. In short, stop picking up babies and expecting them to be really interested in you as a person if you’re old enough to be a grandpa.

    • rocco71

      You’re part of the problem

      • inspirelead

        I don’t even see with the problem is. Yes, I wish that I could meet men my age who matched my intellect, but unfortunately, that has never been the case. I think my comment was edited; I’m in my mid 30’s but everyone on the planet thinks I am 24 or younger. I recently fell madly in love with a man who is 53. Money is irrelevant to me, I just love that he is a gentlemen. It almost feels surreal and undeserving. I don’t see the problem here. We are both crazy about each other in a very euphoric way.

        • rocco71

          “Money is irrelevant” to you? Ha! Ha! Ha! Did you type that with a straight face?

        • Matthew Henry

          Lol yeah keep dreaming sister none of us buys this bullshit!!!

        • Swagman

          Inspirelead- if you indeed feel money is irrelevant (and I’ll withhold my doubts too on that) you represent the tiny fraction, the sliver in the pie of what men experience. Women correctly assume that a man struggling financially is often mentally preoccupied where a man say with substantial inherited wealth appears much more laid back. One is certainly more attractive. But what of the man not struggling just not “wealthy”? I’ve found thru many years of dating that women on average put finances way up on the list of desired attributes. Interestingly but not surprisingly if men want to find women not preoccupied with wealth, they need to look in less affluent areas.

    • HonorWhenNoOnesLooking

      I’m 23 and definitely not a baby. And I’m looking for a life partner who will likely be older because as the article suggest, younger guys these days have little respect(although I would say this extends to many girls as well). Morality is what I care about most and I’m seeing that it’s something a lot of people in the States seem to be missing(despite the pretentious notion that 70% of the US is Christian, ha). And I say this as an agnostic. I feel like an older man will likely be more stable in his values and good conversation as well. Not too old because I would like to start a family within the next five years and realize trying to do that with a 50 year old probably isn’t ideal(35 would be better).

      Not sure about your character if you feel the need to refer to younger women as babies when every single woman im her 20s is biologically capable of reproducing and many already have.

  • Will Warren

    i am 59 look more like early 40s, get hit on by women half my age often, women my age mostly think i am younger than them, and ignore me. I dont have alot of money, or a fancy car, but i pay my own bills, I am fun to be around. and that counts for alot.

    • Matthew Henry

      I’m sure most of the time they are just being nice yes flirting is being nice these days screwed up i agree but that’s what goes on!!

  • JohnG911

    Because there’s no future for millennial men thanks to liberals and feminist.

    https://www.forbes.com/sites/ccap/2015/05/04/the-disappearing-college-male/#75dd00c54d3c

  • Behr Palomo

    Far from “…inconceivable in the long term…” it’s actually fairly common. Not as common as the mainstream practices but it’s easy to find age gapped couples almost any metropolitan area, as well as some rural ones.

  • rocco71

    Truth is forbidden on this site.

  • Ken Dier

    Ok, here what you do if the women play games. First be nice to them but if the cross you go here Backpage.com/personals/ women seeking men there you will have success with no BS. Yes, you must pay but you simply make a deal and you get what you both agreed on. That’s how you handle that. They try to shut you down but in the end your the one getting it and they go to an empty bed or are forced to shack up with someone they didn’t want in the first place. See, always leave yourself and out. They hate that because your getting what their trying to hold in front of you. If you get a sense that they are doing that you simply go to your reliable source.

  • Michael Laman

    I’m 61, and I’d be shocked to find millenials chasing guys my age. I’d be lucky to get a woman in her late 40s or early 50s. I never married, never had children, had to retire at 56 due to illness. I will sell my home soon, and try to downsize my life. I have no idea where I’d find someone to date now. My season has passed. My late father always said–act your age and stop trying to recapture your youth. Two books all women should read are: Save the Males by Kathleen Parker and Marry Him by Lori Gottlieb. Ladies don’t squander your prime dating years on the wrong people. You won’t get to be young again. With age the partner pool gets very small and limited.

  • Kristen Siegrist

    I’m a 21 year old female and I have always been more attracted to older men, preferably because as the article states, “They treat you like you’re human”, and I’ve always found older men attractive. I have been with a 37 year old before, and it was the best experience of my life. I have also been hit on many times by older men, and truthfully it makes my confidence level rise and it makes me feel good about myself.

  • Paul F

    It is funny that everyone feels they are an expert in the relationship field! (at least in this blog) I of course have been married 3 time and have had ladies in Dating relationships/Marriage. Some 10 years older and some 5 years younger in range. I am very lucky I found the right girl and I am convinced if I meet her first I would have been married only to her! However, Millennial’s have a different problem. They had people my age teaching them about relationships. Millennial women have been warned that the men are going to take advantage of them so women they should not depend on them. The Millennial men have been told do not get into a relationship because the laws are geared to women getting the lion’s share of a settlement if they get divorced.
    (especially with children involved) So, they have had very bad teachers. Being a Stepfather I look at it from the outside in! The parents are the ones that let this happen. They did not do a very good job in their relationships. So, it is normal that a young man or woman wants to have stability, security and confidence in a partner. The older person in the relationship is also trying to feel good about themselves and often is attracted to the person that not only looks good. But, has a less defensive attitude. Lets face it both men and women as they get older are able to manipulate a younger person than a older person that has already heard all of the BS from the past! My wife is a saint and is an expert as not listening to my BS!!! That is why you need the right person not the perfect person! See another expert!!!!

  • Jack Fanning

    Daddy issues. Period.