Why Millennial Women Want to Date Older Men

The recent Vanity Fair article detailing the more lurid underbelly of online dating—the barrage of dick pics, the endless swiping, the death of romance—was grim, if not horrific. Dating, Vanity Fair would have you believe, is evolving into an elaborate charade of deception: Everybody is petrified of giving someone the “wrong idea.” Men are impolite to the point of viciousness to ensure that the women they just hooked up with understand they don’t want a relationship. Women “self-objectify” in profile pictures to get men interested, renouncing the “wrong idea” that they might want something more than a one-night stand. No matter which way you spin it, landing yourself in a committed relationship seems to be, by millennial standards, “the wrong idea.”

I want to believe that Vanity Fair selected only their most salacious interviewees to quote, but I know that’s not true. I’ve received my fair share of lewd attention during my online dating tenure to verify: It really is that bad. But I’ve noticed a new strategy among my set of female friends—lovely, intelligent, independent women—to combat the grime of the online dating world: date up.

I don’t mean status, I mean age. More and more women I know are dating men twice, yes twice, their age. In her new film, The Intern, Anne Hathaway stands with Robert DeNiro and a bunch of young male colleagues in a bar and draws a harsh comparison: “How in one generation have men gone from guys like Jack Nicholson and Harrison Ford to . . .?” She gestures despairingly at the four men in front of her, archetypes of my generation in their hoodies, craft beer in one hand, iPhone in the other, with their untrimmed beards and general lack of ambition. I see what Hathaway means: Why put up with Tinder when there’s a whole generation of men out there who wouldn’t dream of using it?

There have never been more advantages to relationships with older men, precisely because Tinder and its ilk have made dating feel impossible to those of us who don’t want to participate in the battle of who-cares-less. Reach back two decades and you are more likely to find a man who can’t fathom swiping through a series of pictures to find a mate for the night.

My friend Gabrielle met her boyfriend at a restaurant opening. They are twenty years apart, and they’ve been together for two. He “treats me like I’m a person,” she told me. “I watch so many of my other friends agonize over text messages from guys who . . . just clearly don’t care.” The stereotypes, she says, are true: Older men are attentive, they aren’t threatened by your career success, they didn’t grow up watching porn on their laptops, and they certainly don’t expect sex from you before you’ve even had a chance to meet. It’s not an “old-fashioned” dating scheme, it’s just a more humane one. “I wasn’t trying to go back in time,” Gabrielle added at the end of our conversation. “Nobody wants to go back to the 1950s, we just want to be treated with respect.”

But there are downsides to large age disparities, and women in particular sacrifice a great deal when they make this choice. Child-bearing and rearing becomes complicated, not to mention the potential for earlier onset of age-related medical challenges, as well as confronting constant social stigma. It’s all pretty inconceivable in the long term, and yet it’s happening all the same. That’s how badly women want to escape the Tinderverse.

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  • Terenc Blakely

    Women hooking up with older men…. a new and earthshaking event.

    As one wag put it; “Well, Pajama Boy isn’t exactly the guy to set your loins a-tingle now, is he?”.

    • Steve Kellmeyer

      Of course, that same (somewhat elderly) wag also supports legal prostitution, so he doesn’t really care if these women end up on the pole.

      • Terenc Blakely

        Assuming you are correct (rather unlikely) how exactly does that impact this article and my comment how? A classic troll comment; an ad-hominem attack on something utterly peripheral to the discussion.

        • Steve Kellmeyer

          Ask the “wag” what he thinks about legal prostitution, or read his blog – he’s quite clear about that, legal abortion, slicing and dicing embryos, selling organs. He’s a libertarian who supports ALL those positions.

          In fact, when asked his position on slicing, dicing babies and selling their organs, he refuses to answer. So, yeah, he explicitly favors prostitution. He has no problem with women dancing on poles. All good. He doesn’t give a flip about most things. Look him up on Google. Easy enough to check.

        • Steve Kellmeyer

          Ask the “wag” what he thinks about legal prostitution, or read his blog – he’s quite clear about that, legal abortion, slicing and dicing embryos, selling organs. He’s a libertarian who supports ALL those positions.

          In fact, when asked his position on slicing, dicing babies and selling their organs, he refuses to answer. So, yeah, he explicitly favors prostitution. He has no problem with women dancing on poles. All good. He doesn’t give a flip about most things. Look him up on Google. Easy enough to check.

          • Again: what does that have to do with the article?

          • Terenc Blakely

            Apparently that wag kicked his dog or something. Kind of a stalker mentality.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            It isn’t about the article, it’s about your comment. You remarked that women hooking up with older men is not new, and then quoted a well-known blogger whose ethics resembles that of a pig for support of your remark.

            I pointed out that the person you quoted to support your remark has the ethics of a pig. Then you trolled my remark. I don’t know why.

          • DaleC

            And we libertarians find your forcing women to behave in certain ways to be piggish. Weird, huh?

            As far as “caring” for these women, unless you operate some kind of ministry outreach to house, feed, clothe and care for those women, or donate significantly to one, neither do you.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            Oh, please. Dicing babies and selling their organs is what the blogger supports. He also supports legal prostitution.

            If we don’t like the law “forcing” people to behave in certain ways, then let’s get rid of rape, burglary, armed robbery and murder laws. Wouldn’t want to interfere with people’s autonomy, right? Libertarianism has all the intellectual force of a teenager.

          • DaleC

            As mentioned before, those acts violate another persons rights.

            Put in language you might understand, Your right to swing your fist ends at the tip of my nose.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            As mentioned before, when that child is still in the womb, Glenn Reynolds has no problem with slicing and dicing the baby. Zero. He has been asked on numerous occasions to make a public statement. He refuses.

            He is on record supporting (1) legal abortion – in fact, he claims he is one of the few lawyers who thinks RvW was CORRECTLY decided, (2) organ sales. Thus, he can have no logical objection to slicing and dicing babies and selling their organs.

            “Your right to swing your fist ends at the tip of my nose.” is a nonsensical rule. By invoking it, you force your morality, your idea of what constitutes proper behaviour, on to someone else. If you really believe in individual liberty, why should ANYONE accept that your rule is valid? You aren’t the boss of other people. If they decide that their right to swing their fist ends when you lie coughing up your heart’s blood in the street, who are you to tell them different?

          • DaleC

            One of the “few” lawyers? Give me a break. Selling there organs violates the law. Weird, but libertarians do believe in following existing laws.

            Assault violates another persons rights. Please go troll someone else.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            “Few lawyers”: those were his words, not mine.

            If selling the organs violated the law, they would be up on charges.

            You haven’t answered the question about slavery. Legally, libertarians should have ZERO problem with someone deciding to sell themselves into slavery.

            Libertarians are teenage pigs.

      • DaleC

        Prostitution and pole-dancing are not the same. Some do both, but the vast majority do not.

        I will assume you are referencing Instapundit, aka Glenn Reynolds, the law professor. Since when is 55 years of age considered “somewhat elderly”? He is also one of the most respected law professors and Constitutional scholars in the country.

        Referencing Prof. Reynolds, we libertarians have this shocking notion that a person should be in control of their own body. We don’t, necessarily, support prostitution, drug use, abortion, pole dancing, etc… what we DO support is your RIGHT to control YOUR body. Weird, I know.

        If the Professor were not happily married to beautiful and accomplished woman, he would be the kind of guy a smart Millennial female would be drawn to like a moth to a flame.

        • Steve Kellmeyer

          The Professor’s wife nearly died from the use of hormonal birth control, yet that same pig still promotes the use of hormonal birth control – even though he knows full well that it is deadly.

          If you control your own body, then stop getting old. Stop growing hungry. Teeny-bopper “intellectuals” like yourself and Glenn Reynolds don’t seem to understand that your premise is wrong. We don’t control our own bodies. Never have. And what we do with our bodies – burglary, theft, rape, assault, murder – certainly should be subject to the law. But, immaturity has a strong draw, which is why libertarians rally around libertarianism like moths to a flame.

          • DaleC

            Wow, can’t argue with that “logic”. By your logic, nothing is in our control.

            “burglary, theft, rape, assault, murder – ” ALL violate the rights of ANOTHER person, unlike drug use, alcohol use, prostitution, etc.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            So, should I have the right to sell myself into slavery? According to YOU, YES! Yes, I should!

            So, according to you, the United States was WRONG to outlaw slavery because I should have the right to sell myself as a slave if I wanted. In fact, many southern blacks did exactly that, to pay off family debts. So, you see nothing wrong with that!

            What wonderful logical consistency!

          • DaleC

            Go troll someone else. That wasn’t slavery and you know it.

          • Steve Kellmeyer

            You don’t have an answer, DaleC.
            Libertarian philosophy doesn’t work.
            It permits slavery.

            Libertarianism is a stupid teenage fantasy.

  • Chance Boudreaux

    Reality catches up to Feminism.

  • There’s been a commonly cited “rule of thumb” around for 30 or more years that the youngest (adult) woman a man should date and consider marrying is half his age plus 7; e.g., a 40-year-old man shouldn’t date anyone younger than 27, or else it becomes a bit creepy. If this article’s assertions are accurate, it’s the women themselves who are bending or breaking this rule of thumb due to the immaturity & lack of life direction of their own age cohort. And that’s a very sad commentary on our culture.

    • tsol

      I always heard that the man has to be 6 years (minimum) older than the woman, so the man would be up to her desired level of maturity and would be more established financially.

    • Anthony Mxyzptlk

      C. Northcote Parkinson articulated this rule around 1963 or so. For women to apply it, they must double their age, then subtract 14. For example, a 27-year old woman would multiply her age by 2 (54), then subtract 14 to get 40.
      A 25-year old woman would double to 50, then subtract 14 to get 36.

  • There are likely at least two reasons for this:

    1. The long term traditional pattern of older, successful men paired with younger “eye candy”, aka the phenomenon of the so-call “Trophy Wife”. A pattern that has existed throughout recorded history, and. .

    2. The current crop of young males is encumbered with massive debt from education expenses, moribund economies worldwide, and a cultural trend that actively opposes the traditional “manly” traits and virtues. Or, the short version, between an accomplished, successful man, and a “Pajamaboy”, the vast majority of women will choose the successful man. . .

    • Phil Harrell

      So I’m not the only one that thinks they just like real men over wimps, I’m 18 yrs older than my gf she’s 34. 4 yrs and so far it’s good, probably doesn’t hurt I treat her as my equal and she pretty much is…

      • DaleC

        I hear you and agree, though most people won’t believe the “equal” part. Oh well, their problem, not ours.

  • Jay Currie

    When I was forty I dated a girl – and lived with her – who was 22. Great fun. She was delighted to be treated as a lady which was basically all I knew how to do. But it was not going to go anywhere simply because the gap in interests and experience was too wide.

    Of course, really clever girls have been older, wealthier men’s mistresses pretty much forever and, in some ways, that is a healthier relationship.

    • “Of course, really clever girls have been older, wealthier men’s mistresses pretty much forever and, in some ways, that is a healthier relationship”
      At least it is a lot more honest.

  • 270

    The happiest man you’ll ever see is a guy in his 40s or 50s dating a woman 15 years younger. At least for the first six months they’re together.

    • m a

      No…. the happiest guy is the one in his 40s/50s enjoying his pursuits and able to meet his responsibilities.
      I’m in that category and my daughter wants to create an on-line dating profile for me. (wife dumped me a few years ago, I kept the kids and the house. She visits.) I asked my daughter if she thinks I’m happy? She said yeah dad, but you deserve to have somebody!! I asked if she ever stopped to think that perhaps I’m happy not despite the fact I have no woman in my life, but because if it?

      • Fraga123

        You deserve 4 somebodies. In rotation.

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  • PurpleAndBlue

    How many older men are there? Are they all divorced? Hmmmm

    Relationships have been taking a hit for some time, and it’s not because something about having a Y chromosome makes you an awful person. In point of fact, nothing scuttles a relationship quicker than one-sided thinking which would sooner blame than reflect. Just have a look at the sociopathy sweepstakes that is modern family law..

    We have a dynamic based on individual license begetting division and disaffection. Saying “it’s the stupid boys’ fault” only furthers this.

  • From what I can tell, this phenomenon is distinct from “trophy wives” and mid-life crisis girl-friends.

    Apparently the women in question want an adult male as a companion; one with manners. Many Millennial boys have been raised in a way which emphasized androgyny. Alas, this approach tends to create gamma males; i.e. non-adults. They suffer in comparison to genuinely adult males.

    • Unfortunately so have many Millennial girls.Many Millennial boys have been raised in a way which emphasized androgyny.”
      Unfortunately so have many Millennial girls.

      • 10songsblog

        Yes but this is really a product of feminism forcing boy to not be boys (i.e.e act out, run around ect.) And yes getting girls to think the kitchen is is evil or that you have to be a mother and working woman… It’s more nuanced than that but it has reached an extreme in terms of the denial of biology and our animal natures. Females want a protector and a provider, males want good child bearing hips/mother (even when they don’t children). *shakes head* Seriously the amount to which we as a society try to deny or reject our animal natures is so silly. Many of the problems would lessen if we just accepted who we are, not what we are but who we are a s animals.

        Let’s just say I never saw a dog or cat have as much difficulty finding a mate even when they are being selective.

  • Ernie Paulson

    This all seems to be based on the disparity between what this generation of men are told to be like, and what their female counterparts really want (which is what every generation of female wants, when rendered down). All the headache inducing crap aside: men want respect, and women want love. Pretend doesn’t cut it.

  • The_Eschaton

    As the article said, this could have negative consequences on child bearing; the US fertility rate stands at 1.9 right now, below the established replacement rate of 2.1. We’re not in a demographic death spiral like some developed nations presently are (e.g., Japan, where annual deaths now significantly outnumber annual live births), but it’s still of concern. Luckily the US remains an immigration magnet, which helps offset the decline in fertility.

  • Fraga123

    The best companion for a hot, sexy younger woman is a sophisticated older man.

  • Yaron

    The interesting reality is that this is nothing new and it has been going on since the existence of modern humans. Maturity and stability in men are as valuable as young and vitality in women. Age is relative, it’s the young spirit which gravitates towards the mature and stable one. From both directions as well, many younger men date older women to escape the “games” and immaturity of younger women.

    Either way, it’s a beautiful thing and judgements on age are childish and irrational.

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  • Chance Boudreaux

    Women have always liked more established older men, what’s new here is that feminism has brainwashed Millennials into being sexually unattractive herbs, so their female counterparts have to date Gen X to find real men. Thanks feminists.

    • raymondmarcano

      They are also feminatzis

    • Annabelle

      Thanks MGTOW as well. Both are responsible for messing up gender expectations. I hate gender expectations. I say live and let live.

      • chromecommando

        Did you mean relations? Expectations does not really sufficiently cut it because my understanding is that the latter is all about not expecting anything and live and let live ultimately. Relations? Now that plays a part there for sure, though I’d focus examining the science behind their ideas more like the findings that apparently single men are happiest demographic. But than asking why that is and if change is desired, then what can be done about it.

      • Joe

        MGTOW is simply in self preservation. I think the concept might not be clear.

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  • Fraga123

    Older men are superior in every way. It’s true. Come, younger women, COME!

  • Alice

    Umm… Millennial women have NO money nor do their boys, of course they’re going for the old guy. Of course the delusional old guys think its him… Ha!

    • DaleC

      I’m 50 and can tell you that we DON’T CARE why young and attractive women want to spend time with us 🙂

    • raymondmarcano

      No…I know it’s because of the help that I can provide. But I’ll take it because it’s better than being alone and going out alone. In fact when they are modest and don’t want to hit me up for money I’ll offer a gas card with the dinner date!! Not a bad deal. How’s that for…….Ha!

    • Rath

      So you’re basically admitting that all women are just whores, the difference is that a prostitute asks for payment directly, and other women ask for it indirectly through paying for a date here, a phone bill there, etc.?

      Because it pretty much sounds like you’re saying that the women are just there for the money… period. If the Millennial men had money, the Millennial women would be with them?

      The whole point of “feminism” was for you to be a “strong independent womyn”. Which you apparently don’t want to be, because, surprise, it costs a lot of money to be independent! So the net result of feminism was failure?

      • Alice

        Feminism was a huge success for professional women. They are a tiny segment of the female population, judging from how loud you’d swear they were 100%. They definitely believe they are the only ones who count. What they have done to the average woman is quite vicious. Many men jumped on the bandwagon too, Not having to support a woman, easy no strings attached sex, not having to marry etc. They don’t particularly like feminism themselves but are quick to use anytime it’s useful to them. You are turning them into whores out of your own selfishness, your knowledge that 90% of them are parrots and your refusal to man-up, get married and love, honor and respect a female.

        • Rath

          Why would I “man up” and marry someone when 47% of marriages end up in divorce? I should just toss a coin and if its heads, burn half of my shit. If its tails, I go on as normal.

          Also, why should I have to “support a woman”?

          You wanted independence, you got it.

          • fellowwarrior

            Marriage is a government lie, just like 9/11, except worse

        • Tony Marcum

          Love, honor, and respect goes both ways.

      • Jennifer Robison

        Not all women. Just millennial ones. It is a fact that as women have enjoyed more economic freedom and independence, they are marrying later and even less because they simply don’t need a spouse financially.

      • Tony Marcum

        Amen. My wife was older than me, and it was only about money, I was just too naive to see it in the beginning.

    • Tony Marcum

      Gen-X women, for the most part, have no money either. Unless they stole it in the form of alimony from their ex-husband. What’s the difference?

  • DaleC

    I am a single 50-year old and date women on both sides of my age. Although youthful appearance is nice, you have to talk to each other and I find the younger women tend to have less baggage than older women. A LOT less. Hearing about problem children and idiot ex-husbands doesn’t entertain us. Although this is not true of all women closer to my age, it applies to the vast majority with whom I have interacted.

    I used to avoid younger women, because of the stigma, but found that I enjoy the company better if I ignore the “rules”.

    Speaking of stigma, guess who gives these younger women the hardest time? Women my age hahahaha

    • Tony Marcum

      Dale.. you are exactly right. It’s the jaded men haters who whine about the direction they took their lives, and the fact they cannot get over it, that have placed a stigma. Instead of dealing with their issues and taking care of themselves, they just blame everyone else. That’s why they are alone in the first place, they just can’t see it.

  • Black Ryder

    Once again…. This “problem” all of these foolish females continue to complain about is utterly, totally, completely, fully, and without any doubt or question, the direct and proven with decades of scientific fact to back it up caused by women themselves!!

    To illustrate…. 100% of the females chase the tiny 20% fraction of the men at “the top” and totally ignore the remaining 80% while crying there are no “good men left” as if reality and their personal behavior and choices do not apply to them.

    http://terminalblackout.tumblr.com/post/135220366112/the-problem-has-never-been-a-lack-of-quality-men

    • Annabelle

      Yeah, Photoshop is great, isn’t it? You can literally lie through your teeth and attempt to get others to believe you. Here’s the original Business Insider article:
      http://www.businessinsider.com/causes-of-low-marriage-rates-2014-5

      • Deaths Head

        Wow… As if I give a flying fuck what some random lying whore thinks.

        The proof is in the pudding cunt, and deceitful bitches like you love to sell the bullshit con about how you want a nice guy, but only after you’ve fucked your way through high school, college, a few jobs, and then finally figure out that your snotty attitude doesn’t have the boys lining up for your overpriced and over hyped used goods anymore.

        Then it’s time to offer some sucker 129th place in the support my dope dealers kids for me because I shouldn’t ever need to be responsible game. Face it cupcake, men are waking up to the divorce rape racket that worthless bimbos like you have been trading on for decades.

        So you go right ahead, call me a faggot, or needle dick creepy loser who lives in a basement all you like because your worn out shit show wont sell here!

        So you head on back to chasing those parole violators, making those false rape claims, cashing your welfare check, playing the victim, and screaming about how empowered you are because I’m going to keep showing men that wasting their time, money, sanity, and lives supporting parasites like you isn’t worth it.

      • J Matthews

        The pink X through the word and the different larger font of “the truth…” sort of indicated to me immediately that he was making a point / joke about the article but perhaps the obvious escapes you?

        • Intelligence didn’t escape her, it avoided her like the plague.

    • Annabelle

      Your Tumblr account is why you’re still single when it comes to women. If you don’t like women (as shown by your Tumblr posts), maybe you should try dating men. This could help your “problem” with reality, personal behavior, choices, and psychological projection.

    • Sir Companion

      bad seed

  • 10songsblog

    I tell certain types of guys around me to date up if they want to avoid obnoxious, drunks, or SJW tumblr females and males. They are usually more mature have had some serious therapy, lived life and know what they want and don’t waste time. They don’t pull regret sex antics, or race cards, NEARLY as much because they lived in age before the internet made whining trendy and common and they’ve already cheated and been cheated on and lied to so they know how it feels..

    But a more important factor in all of this is that when the young people who grew praised and told they were special and could not fail all their life get on-line to find their cliques and peers they discover find much to their disdain they are average and just like everybody else. They are not special or even really very unique. They all wear the same clothes and listen to the same music…It’s just a giant HS of average even the usual cliques have such blurred lines that you can’t really use that to find your group (i.e. goth, skater, jock, science nerd…).

    And that hurts… because you want to be unique… this is also why I think there has been such a huge rise in new words people use to describe themselves and things they like. For example what me and my friends called techno now has like 5-7 other terms just so people can say they like something new or different and claim it’s not techno and that they or somebody are doing something new. “When you’re genre fails fails you, give it a new name…”

    This could be applied to anything really. And also think this sameness is one reason the internet produces so much hate speech and angry comments because people don’t want to be like everyone else so they tear down the other to distances themselves and feel unique and special.

    But back to finding out you are bland and like everybody else as I think it relates to dating. You think that would feel unifying except that since most people by in large are unexceptional and you were raised with such praise of your average gifts only to find out they are really average it kind of sucks… And so when you start to date on-line 99% of the people seem so average and blah because because you are drawing from this HUGE pool of what looks like blah to you sooooooo you put even more label and definitions on yourself to prove you are not average and are unique, to try and stand out but don’t really want to wade through the see of blah yourself. Yet too find a good match takes time and if everybody expecting the other 1% of unique peers to wade their way through the blah to you,you get nowhere.

    So I say if you don’t want to waste your time on your average peers date up. You may not have the same pop culture in common but I can guarantee it won’t be boring, being with somebody whose been around the sun a decade or more than you have teaches you a lot more than you can imagine.

  • raymondmarcano

    The bible is full of these stories…old geezers married to young girls some even just teens. This is nothing new. I think it’s popular now in the US because our beloved politicians have destroyed our economy and times are tough just like in a 3rd world country. You break into the paint fab and you’ll get dirty. You invade a 3rd world country and you become 3rd world. But you can’t blame a gal to get more out of a relationship than just being with some young punk who just wants to get his rocks off and enjoy her wears. The old fart like me can help you with college….books included!

    • Sir Companion

      Raymond, you brought the bible up,
      so have you read ‘The Strange Woman’, the meaning behind this story and the offspring that it creates? we need to understand Allegorical opposed to a literal sense.
      Is’s not in just one passage, however it does explain the seed that’s manifested into this world.

      Nothing has changed between man and woman for over six thousand years, Nothing, they are all doing the same things to one another.. A good read is by Annabel Lyon/ The Golden Mean.

      And just because someones a psychologist doesn’t mean jack hoot! they can be more screwed up than the patient, observe, and if asked , only they if they have something constructive to say, it should be said in a way where there client believes they’ve come to a resolution..

      I’ve been reading here between old man river and young girl, Most immigrants, the husband would come over first set up camp, work so his family could make the voyage, his twelve or thirteen year old wife and however man kids they had at that point it became twelve children, she would have had to be pretty young. obvious they weren’t lacking impotence.

      A lot of these young women come down pretty hard on older guys, I like to know what makes then think older man with with half a brain would want anything to do with them, obvious he must have hobbies , If not the Art’s something in life that makes him happy.
      An Einstein quote “Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”

      We do not know tomorrow, one wakes up to ovarian cancer, breast cancer,HPV, and all this young and old guy and what you think is best won’t matter much,

      why do people not take a break between relationships, try to understand that lead to your current ramifications,

      And the one thing we all forget to soon, we all only live so long, for some, life is even shorter.

  • Annabelle

    I like this article but the last paragraph leaves the reader hanging. What kinds of medical issues do younger women have dating older men and what’s up with child-bearing issues?

    • Rath

      It might (I say might because there’s not enough statistically significant evidence to say for certain) be the case that as men get older, their children are at risk for autism.

      • chromecommando

        I am a psychologist and yes that is one of the many that have increased risks like Autism, ADD (ADHD) and genetic conditions. My parents were old when they had me (both +40) and that is likely the reason I have a rare uncurable disease known as Chrons Syndrome and thus also why there wont be a family of my own.

        But don’t let that scare you, rather have it serve as a reminder that should childrearing come into consideration, then there are increasing risks involved and it would be beneficial to have the condition checked out before having a baby. Of course the more fit both parties are, the less likely are there going to be any complications.

        • J Matthews

          yeah, I saw that Swedish study, just as likely due to the vaccines used in the same time period.

        • Teacher_in_Tejas

          ON the other side, a greater chance for a gifted child on the other end of the proverbial Bell Curve. My Mom had me at 42 back in 1965, when women didn’t have kids at 35 let alone 40, and I was reading at a college level in the sixth grade. Although Mom later told me about all those worries they had about problems, especially Downs Syndrome.

    • Jennifer Robison

      Older men have more health problems. Be prepared to be his nursemaid.

      • raymondmarcano

        oh what a stupid warning Jennifer just gave…I bet you’ll be lonely the rest of your life and be an old maid.

      • DoubleCoppers

        As a generalization, that’s correct, but…if a much younger woman picks an older man who already has health problems, it’s an open question as to whether it’s self-sacrificing, ghoulish, or gold-digging. But what of the case where a woman goes out with a healthy, vital older man b/c she’s tired of the characteristics of her cohort men? I’m 62 and my wife is 41, and everyone (who doesn’t know) thinks I’m 40 and she’s 30. In many parts of America, many women older than 35 are overweight and seem to be almost proud of it–they sure aren’t doing anything about it. In contrast, I work out 3x per week, walk the dog 2 miles daily, and control my eating, even though I love to eat and could easily gain 40 or 50 pounds. My thought is “Why should I settle for a woman who’s 40 lbs over (and gaining) just b/c she’s ~ my age?

        A question for you: Would you go out with someone with movie-star looks, say Brad Cooper, Ryan Reynolds, Brad Pitt, with them 40 and you early 20s? If yes, then you understand why men and women are doing so.

      • Tony Marcum

        Wow, you really are not very intelligent. My father is 75 years old and has not a single health problem.

  • sandre

    Just say NO and go older!

  • Reach back two decades and you are more likely to find a man who can’t fathom swiping through a series of pictures to find a mate for the night.

    • Müslim BAY

      sana söz seni bulucam ne olursa olsun bulucam o para benim evden kovulmama neden olacak ve ben her şeyi bırakıp peşine düşücem bi şekilde bulucam seni

  • Joe

    As a gen X’r dating a millennial I agree with most of the article. Older men do know what they want in life and grew up outdoors and having numerous more responsibilities. Only disagreement I have is what was wrong with the 50’s? June and Ward Cleaver weren’t happy? Did he not respect his spouse. He did. He also knew how to be. a man. When being mildly aggressive was a positive. Many Gen x people feel betrayed by boomers and so many children grow up in fatherless homes and now you are bombarded with sexuality confused with accomplishment and crowded prisons because boys didn’t have fathers correct them. Thanks boomers. I will always admire the greatest generation. Grew up during depression and rose to win a horrible war. Boomers felt like they had to re invent the wheel. What a great job they did. Feminism and skinny jeans just aren’t going to bring success.

    • Teacher_in_Tejas

      I’ve always looked at it this way, Every generation has said the following “I am never going to be like my parents” and guess what, most generations did the exact same thing as their parents. But it was the Boomers who grew up with the material wealth earned by the sweat and blood of the Greatest Generation who screwed that up. The generation who stood naked in the rain at Woodstock said, “Hey I’m gonna be cool with my kids. I’ll smoke dope with my son. Let my teenage daughter bring her boyfriend over for the night……” And you know what? They actually went ahead and did it!

  • fellowwarrior

    If she doesn’t know what GLP or chemtrails are, she’s not the one for me

  • Jennifer Robison

    There’s one major flaw in the reasoning of this piece: Older men who would date women young enough to be their daughter are the biggest leches of them all. They’re definitely more subtle and sophisticated about it than their brutish, immature, twenty-something counterparts, but they are every bit as dirty. The only reason they would never use Tinder is because they can’t figure out how to use an app. And yes, Jack Nicholson could probably 100-freaking-percent fathom swiping through pictures to find a cheap date for the night.

    • raymondmarcano

      It’s been around since the beginning of relationships…in fact the norm that you refer to really started in the 19th century…I have had relationships with ladies ranging from 19 to 22 and I’m 58…they laugh easy…they are happy with KFC popcorn chicken and the slightest praise and courtesy towards them they tell you that you are the best and they also say that they are done with guys there age that just want one thing…Sorry Jennifer that this bugs you and it confirms that women my age have a perennial chip on their shoulder and even correct grammar during a dinner date conversation. Who needs that? definitely not a 58 yo like me.

      • Tony Marcum

        Amen Raymond! I’m done with the women my age. Incredibly self-centered, jaded, and only out for their own. My wife who was older than me had to have every single thing her way, and if not, I was the typical man. Oddly, with her being 51, I felt like I was married to a 10 year old.

        I sat with a 22 year old woman last night. The most intelligent, hopeful, and wise woman I have ever spoken with. I felt like I was speaking to what a 51 year old should be.

    • Tony Marcum

      Another jaded man-hater. It oozes from every word. Get over yourself.

  • raymondmarcano

    Yep 100% true…jennifee Robison has pwnis envy issues

  • Jennifer Robison

    I’m not jaded. I’m tired of being hit on by men who are old enough to be my dad. It’s gross. There’s nothing wrong with simply being attracted to younger people. That’s natural. The question is why you are unwilling or unable to relate to people your age in an actual relationship. Nor would “the great majority” of people agree with you that that’s natural. According to Census numbers, marriages in which the husband is 20-plus years older than his wife make up just 0.6 percent of US marriages. Include marriages in which the man is 10 years or more older, and it is still just 6.5 percent. The plurality of marriages — a third of all unions — are between people who are a year or less apart. The median age gap between married couples is less than three years and shrinking every year. Admit you have a problem that is outside the norm and please think about the younger women who don’t want anything to do with old men, and understand there’s something wrong with the ones who do. Thanking you and your pervy brethren in advance for leaving us alone.

    • raymondmarcano

      so stupid labeling that as perverted….you have no idea how to touch a mans heart and the smile of a 20 yo woman can do just that….Jennifer you have issues of hate and envy…seeing an older man as some sort of disgusting reject…don’t worry you’ll get that same discrimination too.

      • Tiffany

        I agree, older men are so much better for younger women

    • raymondmarcano

      I hope you get dogged by young punk guys the rest of your life…then you’ll be craving for older men to hit on you.

    • Tony Marcum

      It’s gross? really? They are prevs? really? You have confirmed that this is alll your opinion. You don’t like older guys? Then don’t date them. But stay off the internet judging other people who do not see things the way you do. Stop lying to yourself, you are jaded. Just read your first sentence.

      We cannot relate to women our own age, because they are entitled, controlling, and judgmental. No thanks, I’d rather die alone than partake in that again.

      Oh and who’s norm? Yours? Who gets to determine the norm? You?

    • Tiffany

      An older man is what I love, the laughs, fun we have together, time we spend together is more than amazing. My friend is 59, he is 26 years older than me and he is the best man ever!

      • raymondmarcano

        good for you for being open minded about this…thank you…it’s Jennifer Robison’s problem to be with a younger cheating guy…Us old guys are loyal 100% because we appreciate so much the attention from a younger gal that we would never jeopardize that.

    • raymondmarcano

      Youre so stupid and your stats are lies..you will die lonely and the young punks will cheat on you…You are a gross woman jennifer robison

    • raymondmarcano

      you are gross and a perverted sexual predator…Jennifer Robison.

  • Project Zeta

    Very well said, sir!

    The entitlement attitude of that woman needed to be countered. Thank you.

  • Iam Popeye99

    Jennifer, I seldom visit this site anymore because I find way to many people expressing their particular ‘opinion’ as though it were a ‘fact’. For whatever reason, I came here now. Maybe it was to consider and process your argument.

    You make two statements which are based on a basic, human error. The belief in absolutes. As each woman is different, so is each man.

    My wife, almost 28 years younger than me, 3 years younger than my oldest son and 7 weeks older than my oldest daughter, and I were married for five years last month. Our approach to intimacy didn’t begin until last summer. She died two weeks after our anniversary.

    When we were going together, I often asked her why she was interested in me. I couldn’t understand this. Her answer was she was looking for something different in a man, and she found it in me.

    Your first absolute, “Older men have more health problems. Be prepared to be his nursemaid,” may be common, but not necessarily the norm. I nursed my wife, one way or another, from about a year after our marriage. I attended her every need 24/7/365. When was the last time you were wakened several times each night to attend to someone’s needs or to comfort them?

    Your next absolute is,”Older men who would date women young enough to be their daughter are the biggest leches of them all.” What I have said already should be an adequate response to this.

    As each person is different, so is each relationship. The problem, as I see it, isn’t age or generation, it is the misguided and prejudicial opinions of others.

    You, Jennifer, have a right to hold and express your beliefs, your opinions. So do I.

  • kiara

    Those kinda relationships are taboo for reason in society and are quite rare ,and its not normal or moral to date someone who can be your father ,grandfather ,mother or grandmother or even worse age like your KID.!
    This kinda articles are always written by the people who are not objective and are not facts but personal opinions..
    I’m not here accusing anyone ,but i think its just not appropiate morally,ethically to do this. Study finds the bigger the age gap, the more likely that the couple will divorce.
    Research from Emory University shows the bigger the age gap in a marriage … the more likely that couple won’t last.
    Now, at first that might sound like it makes sense. But according to this research, even being as little as one year apart can matter. The study was originally published in September 2014.
    In the past people were doing lots of things that are considered illegal today (pedophilia,racism etc..) and women were repressed by society and mans in general ,thats why some young women were (unfortunately still are in 3rd world countries) SOLD because of money and power to RICH OLDER MANS…! Yes sold like slaves !
    I am still young women in my 20’s and i hate when some old man on the street or a pub approach me -and i know for a fact that other young girls thinks the same !

    • Tony Marcum

      In one sentence you say, “This kinda articles [sic] are always written by the people who are not objective and are not facts [sic] but personal opinions.”

      You go on to say:

      “…”but I think it’s just not appropiate [sic].”

      If you have to say, I think… then this is your opinion.

      The true fact of the matter is, despite any research study, despite your opinion, and despite any other jaded and faded woman or man who sneers at this because of some unhealed past hurt, it’s simply none of your business.

      We each live our life and we live it how we want regardless of what you or any other jaded person might think. The fact that you found this article is telling. I suspect, someone significant to you is dating someone much younger, and it’s destroying you. Get over it, and go out and do what is right for you!

      I’m divorced from a woman who turned out to be a narcissistic man hater, and she was older than me, yet acted like a 5 year old emotionally. How did she raise her kids? To be narcissists who could not treat a woman any age with a shred of decency and respect.

      Every single woman my age that I have interacted with is jaded and only concerned with her needs and what she can get. Why in the world would I ever want to be involved with that?

      So to older jaded women, get over yourself and realize that all men are not the same. Stop being crazy, and this judgment is the very evidence. Raise your boys to be respect women, and may you can compete with the younger non-jaded women.

      • Irene Petty

        Have you ever listened to Tom Leykis?
        He just about sums up older men for me.
        Younger men seem to be kinder, and have less judgement.

        • Clean Willie

          There’s your problem. Leykis is a grade A, wife abusing douchebag. Why anyone would listen to him is beyond me.

    • Tiffany

      I believe that age is just a number. Older men make great companions with younger women.

      • Sue Donnem

        And vice versa. We older women are having fun with younger men.

    • Jaded satyr

      Well, whatever Emory University says must be true, right?

  • alex

    Men will screw anything. Im above average looking abd i was also once average looking. Made no difference. In fact these days im an escort pulling in many high profile/famous clients but even my more average looking escort friends are pulling them in too, just half as often. Your entire comment is bullshit and its not surprising. Mens only talent, and half assed at that, is manipulation.

  • Tiffany

    I am 33 and I absolutely love being with an older man. I have a 59 year old guy friend and we have so much fun together. Older men know what they want, they please us younger women in every way, and they are true gentlemen. Older men are amazing, they understand how to love a woman, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. An older man knows how to hold a younger woman when she needs to be held and puts in time which is why we younger women nowadays prefer a much older man.

    • nyny3a

      Yes!

  • Stevie Jay Elmm

    As a man in his 30’s I honestly love talking to older women. Not because of the fantasy the media makes it out to be or the movie/porn industry but the reality to me is many women I talk to over 40 got it together and it’s no games. Girls in their 20’s act worse than teenage girls (I got plenty of both in my family around me to know) Girls around my age are okay but many of them still single are looking for the perfect man and judgemental. Women I know over 40 and hey almost 60 just are sexy, smart, work, independent etc. I know not all but a lot I speak to. Whether it’s to date or just strike up a casual conversation I love the company and maturity. I just got out of a long term relationship with a women my age and it had ups and downs but her maturity was all over the place and her rules with her life and a relationship life was childish. Difference between being young at heart and silly at times and just straight out childish.

  • Monkeywrench542 .

    I am a 55 year old man, currently dating a 24 year old lady for the last 16 months. I treat her as a lady and do not mind doing things that men should do for ladies. she was taken aback by them when i 1st started dating her, and now does not complain when i do them for her. we both love each other and enjoy doing lots of the same things together.

  • VictorErimita

    Third wave feminism set out to destroy the masculine, and it has largely succeeded among the generation of males that have been pathologized since birth. So, thank your enlightened sistren for bequeathing this dating scene to you.