Christie Brinkley’s Bikini Feminism

And for your daily dose of “body positivity” I present to you: Christie Brinkley and daughters. . . featured in Sports Illustrated’s annual swimsuit issue.

Brinkley is perhaps the most famous model to grace the cover of the annual issue because she once appeared there three years in a row. Now she’s back in the magazine, with her two daughters flanking her wearing next to nothing. And they are spinning it as somehow empowering to women.

For starters, we are supposed to think Brinkley is defying ageism against women because she is 63. Never mind that she is a supermodel and hence a complete genetic anomaly because she still looks 33 (although she has also admitted to religious use of fillers, lasers, and Botox). Ironically, this has the effect of only reinforcing our stubborn cultural connection between beauty and age-defying youth.

According to Brinkley, when approached about appearing in the bikini issue at an age when many women are grandmothers, “My first thought was, ‘At my age? No way!’ When I turned 30, I was like, ‘This is the last time I’m posing in a bathing suit!’ When this issue comes out, I’ll be 63. I thought, ‘Those days are over.’”

Aw shucks, Christie! Aren’t you a piece of humble pie. Everyone else: don’t wear a swimsuit past age 30 if you are a woman.

But Brinkley was swayed by the chance to give it “one last go” with her daughters, who apparently have suffered from their own dark days of anxiety about appearing practically nude in a magazine that will be seen by millions of people.

“Thank you Sports Illustrated for sending the powerful message that good things come in packages of every size and we do not come with an expiration date!” said Brinkley.

Brinkley and daughters clearly think that they themselves come in some size other than stick thin, hence Alexa Ray Joel’s gushy humble brag on Instagram:


In a piece for People magazine entitled, “Christie Brinkley’s Girls Alexa and Sailor Reveal They’ve Conquered Bullies and Body Shamers (and Still Love Carbs!),” sister Sailor Brinkley Cook echoed the sentiment: “I’ve never had this stick skinny classic model body. But with the help of my mom, I came to the conclusion that this is who I am and this is my body,” she says. “I eat very healthy and I work out all the time. If you want to book me, this is my body. That’s it. I’m not going to do crazy diets.”

People clarified in the next sentence that Cook is actually gluten free and vegan (and so can eat about five things), but “she isn’t afraid of the occasional splurge.” Phew!

So young women of today can rest assured that skinny women who don’t eat should dig deep and find the courage to embrace their bodies. The rest of us who eat and don’t weigh 100 pounds, well, forget about it. Or at least forget about the dream of appearing on the cover of soft porn for men, something Brinkley suggests is some sort of laudable life goal for a confident woman.

“How many years ago,” she said in an interview, “I was that insecure girl hoping that I would be good enough for the magazine. So to see my daughters now having the same thoughts I had, and to be able to see them actually be there on the job, was definitely a big moment.”

Isn’t the women’s movement grand? The struggle to look skinny enough to “grace” the pages (as CNN put it) of a magazine issue meant to titillate men’s fantasies involves not eating and wearing virtually nothing and is sold to the rest of us as some sort of empowering “big moment” for women young and old.

Sorry, Christie, but most of us can see the feminist movement for what it is: loosely strung together and barely there, like Brinkley’s daughters’ bikinis.

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  • tanarur

    I can just imagine what the writer of this article looks like…

    • Micha_Elyi

      She looks pleasant and bright, with chances of excitement.
      Rest assured she doesn’t look like Betty Friedan.

      • tanarur

        Her soul is a shriveled and dark thing, whatever else may be.

        • m a

          You say that like it’s a bad thing. As a person whose soul is as bitter and dark as leftover coffee the next morning — I almost care enough to be offended. Almost.

      • DevilDog Ding

        Beauty is only skin deep but ugly goes all the way through.

        • Brinkley and daughters clearly think that they themselves come in some size other than stick thin, hence Alexa Ray Joel’s gushy humble brag on Instagram:

    • osis

      She isn’t bad looking, but she is no Christie Brinkley. In fact, that is precisely the criticism I add. It is the author and her beauty tier peer-group that would benefit the most from knocking down the Brinkleys of the world. If men didn’t know of rare beauty, the authors group would be gold, not silver.

  • TomDPerkins

    ” And they are spinning it as somehow empowering to women. ”

    And what, it’s de-powering? It’s immaterial that there’s not much material, and they look good in it.

    ~ loosely strung together and barely there, like this article ~

    FIFY

    • m a

      Ashley has hit on the contradiction often put forward by feminists. Women themselves praising some girl for going to some event/appearing somewhere practically naked as it being ’empowering’ and men having no right to criticize—misogynistic prudes. Then turning around and criticizing women appearing somewhere they don’t approve of.
      Saddest thing is — the kids are pretty much regurgitating the same crap you’ll hear in women’s studies classes across the US.

  • DevilDog Ding

    Aw, are you feeling a little ugly this morning?

  • bobbymike34

    Just dripping with scorn, cynicism and contempt, I feel sorry for the writer I read deep psychological problems.

  • AntiCitizenOne

    This author’s hate will drive her to age faster.

  • lewy14

    Whatever rich patron is behind this crapflood is lighting its money on fire with a blowtorch.

  • DrAM

    As a Christian, I can forgive Christie and her daughters.
    As a Christian, I can admire Christie and her daughters.
    As a man, I can dream about Christie and her daughters.
    … it makes the world go round you know.
    Christie is a kind person, with a sense of humor, who lives
    a decent life. What more can we ask?
    She does not spend all her life being mean and ugly to other
    people, looking at you Ashley E McGuire!

  • Porky Pug

    Don’t be such a d-bag, Ashley.

  • Bell Rock Jacky

    “…her daughters, who apparently have suffered from their own dark days of
    anxiety about appearing practically nude in a magazine that will be seen
    by millions of people.”

    Her daughter Alexa has already appeared *completely* nude in that magazine back in 1989…. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/aa05777e9d8989c6cb7119ad02a41ee1a49954aaa45998999bd3f3b23ef715f9.jpg

  • SamWah

    It ain’t enough “next to nothing” for me.

  • Mark Andrew Edwards

    Bitter much, Ashley?

  • chasrmartin

    Envy is never attractive.

  • John Born

    “Claws in, you cat.”

    Henry Higgins

  • VictorErimita

    Yes, let’s body shame the pretty girls.

  • DanielAMcAllen

    Brinkley looks great, but 30? Not a chance. I would guess 50 maybe, but that is not a 30 year old body and the obvious face work clearly says 50+. All that aside though, she looks beautiful without any age qualifier required.

  • realDEEBEE

    Ashley that was a perticularly rancid Vagina Monologue

    • m a

      Yeah, I hope getting the vitriol off her chest helped her, a bit bitter and a bit snarky. Sad in that there really is some material here to show how feminism in the west has really become a ‘first world problem’ virtue signaling babble for privileged white women.
      Brinkley and her daughters are just regurgitating the same contradictory type speels you’ll hear at college campuses and women’s meetings across the country.

  • BunnyHooHoo

    SI put a chubby model in last year and an even chubbier one in this years edition, and both have been fairly well received. Next year maybe it will be “my 600 pound swimsuit life” with a moustache and pockmarked face – so there is light at the end of the tunnel.